Modern Parenting Dilemmas: The ‘Only English’ Child

Is the rising tide of young people in India who can only speak English, a natural by-product of globalization? Or a modern parenting dilemma?

Recently I visited my cook’s home for a Pooja. I was introduced to her 3 year old nephew. At the mother’s insistence, the tot droned the alphabet, recited a couple of nursery rhymes and thanked me for my praise; nothing amazing in itself in an Indian home, except that every single word uttered by the child was in English.

Proudly, the mother announced (in Marathi), “We are sending him to an English medium school soon.”

In our country, it is far more.

In a country of 18 official languages and over 350 spoken dialects, English is the medium of instruction for higher education and later jobs, national or international. Many of us converse easily in English, with colleagues and friends of differing backgrounds. English is perceived to be an economic and social equalizer.

My Indian language story

Twenty years ago, we were clueless about parenting but full of theories. Frankly, we were perturbed by the number of children who could not speak a native tongue without interspersing English. We had decided that we would teach our child only Marathi or Konkani, these being our respective mother tongues. We would deliberately avoid English for conversation at home.

Anyway, soon we had a live subject to test our theories on. After about three years of communicating in one language only, we had a child fluent in Marathi and a smattering of Konkani and Hindi (our own spoken-language skills also improved considerably).

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At a gathering of old friends with their spouses and children, our son was the only one who knew no English. The other kids spoke mostly English! The other children were discussing Dr. Seuss, while my son knew only Amar Chitra Katha. They played hide-and-seek, while my son wanted to play luka-chupi. We could see that he felt completely alienated.

We wondered if our decision had been the right one.

But we wondered too soon. After a while, amazingly, the barrier erected by language was broken by the inclusivity that childhood bestows! And they were chattering away in a motley of tongues and playing like old friends.

The convenience of English

English is, indeed the language of the future, as far as jobs and global communication is concerned. Certain technical terms and phrases do not have an equivalent in local tongues. In many Indian families, learning English starts rather early.

For many, such as my cook’s relative, English is an ‘open sesame’ vis-a-vis their education and jobs (as indeed, it is!) For the odds to be evened out, parents who do not speak English are anxious to have a headstart for their offspring. And who can blame them?

For mixed language couples, it is a convenience. For example, if the mother speaks Tamil, and the father speaks Punjabi (Two States!), one of the parents will have trouble speaking to the child as they are both not conversant with each other’s language.

More often than not, in middle and upper class families, English is the language spoken at home, and is a first language for their children. But given that children learn very fast, why not take the trouble of teaching them a native language? These children will learn English as a second language rather easily, given that English will be the medium of instruction at school and their parents are also fluent in it.

Developmental experts say that while the primary language for a child should be the mother tongue, learning a foreign language improves cognition and mathematical skills. Sadly, in many modern Indian families, the foreign language is often the mother tongue, not English.

More than just a language

Language is a key to preserving culture as well. So are we in the process, creating a future in which our local tongues will fade away and also, our cultural fingerprint?

English is a language of communication globally. Still, knowing an Indian language, preferably your mother tongue is good.

Looking back, I am glad that our child learnt Marathi. He can converse with us, his grandparents, and enjoy a play, song, movie in Marathi. I take great pleasure in his interaction in Konkani with my mother.

Is this line of thought typical of a person of my generation? This worry that, in the future, most Indian languages will be a hybrid of English inserts?

Or, is it an inevitable side-effect of globalization and as unstoppable as global warming! Am I being oversensitive about something that is just a means of communication?

Pic credit: Ankur (Used under a CC license)

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