Signs Of Abuse – Know Them! Spot Them! Lend Your Support!

The signs of domestic abuse are often not visible. Knowing how to spot them might help you save yourself or a person you love. #WomenOnTheMove.

Abuse is not always physical and it is not always visible. One of the most dangerous kinds of abuse is emotional abuse. However, regardless of whether it is physical, emotional or of some other form, abuse is always about exercising control over another human being. The abusive partner uses oppression as a means to assert his or her privileges and dominance against the other person.

Abuse can be categorised into various types – physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, technological abuse and financial abuse. All these behaviors are used to control or exert power over a partner. That said, I believe emotional abuse is the most dangerous of all, simply because it is invisible to most. Gaslighting is a sneaky kind of emotional abuse where a person is manipulated in such a way that they start doubting their own sanity and sense of judgement.

Could b so many things – body language/behaviour/the way one speaks. Stimes, not even visible. Many endure emotional abuse. #WomenOnTheMove https://t.co/KFXFUiuWrM

— Tarang Sinha (@TarangSinha) October 25, 2017

Abuse is not gender specific. However, it is seen that the vast majority of abuse victims are women. One might argue, why do women bear the abuse? Why don’t they speak up? Well, it is not as easy as it looks. Most of the times, especially in emotional abuse, women are not even aware that they are being abused. Then there are others who misinterpret emotional or technological abuse as being signs of possessiveness and love of their partners. Plus, victims of abuse receive very little practical or emotional support.

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Last week, in our weekly #WomenOnTheMove chat over at Twitter, we discussed on how to spot the signs of abuse and how can we help the victims to break the cycle of abuse. This is what they said.

Spotting the signs of abuse

Whether it is you or someone you know and love, helping a victim and breaking the cycle of abuse can only happen if you know what to look for.

A1. Isolation followed by a counter effort to act breezy–in case you try to pry. #WomenOnTheMove

— Satarupa B Kaur (@BeingAKaur) October 25, 2017

Isolation is a tactic that the abuser resorts to so that he/she can keep the abuse hidden from the public eye. If the victim is isolated, he/she cannot seek help. Continuous isolation leaves the victim delirious and confused. They refuse public interaction which in turn emboldens the abuser to carry on with the abuse.

A1 Person being quiet, hesitant to interact, bruises, gives unconvincing excuses, can hint to the person being abused. #WomenOnTheMove

— rashi mital (@Rashi_AMital) October 25, 2017

Reaching out

For a victim, who isn’t even aware that he/she is being abused, breaking the cycle of abuse might not be an option. In these scenarios, reaching out to the victim, making them aware of the abuse and helping them out of it might be a challenge.

Listen. Comfort. (If they ever share). Because, you can’t do much if the person doesn’t want to be helped, actually.#WomenOnTheMove https://t.co/twVWoCNtqt

— Tarang Sinha (@TarangSinha) October 25, 2017

If not you, no one will!

That’s is what you should think. Yes, it is true if the victim herself doesn’t want to break free, out efforts might prove futile. However, if we care, we will keep trying in little big ways.

A2 #WomenOnTheMove
Isnt easy at all 2 make such ppl speak up.
Make them feel important.
goad them 2wards doing what they like

— Mamta Jain (@mamtatwits) October 25, 2017

Trust her

Earning the victim’s trust can be a challenge but is the only way to help her break the cycle of abuse.

A2. Give her the space & security she needs in order to speak up. For eg, not forcing her but engaging in a heartfelt chat, maybe. (1/2)

— Kasturi Patra (@PatraKasturi) October 25, 2017

Spotting abuse might be hard but not impossible. You just have to be vigilant, empathetic and aware.

A1. You know something amiss by instinct. Be more observant to see if there is a consistency between the words and actions #WomenOnTheMove

— Tina Sequeira (@tinajsequeira) October 25, 2017

Image: Pixabay

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