Work, Identity And Me

It is Monday and I had a super busy weekend I should say. I have a child who is full of energy all day, who also thinks that sleep is a waste of his time. One really needs all the energy in the world while with him.

Going to work allows me to refill my energy levels to keep up with my little man. I love coming back home after work to his happy smile. I know I only have a limited amount of time each day, both, in office and to spend with my son, this is one thing that undeniably motivates me to make the most of both. I love rushing home to my son and it has been almost a year of all this. I mean, me going back to work. I am happy I went back, and I don’t regret it one bit.

We, my husband and I, thought it would be good for me to go back to work as soon as I felt comfortable about it. Of course, there were well-meaning suggestions from people telling me that I was going to change my mind after I have held our “little bundle of joy” in my hands. I did not, however, change my mind; I was more anxious than imagined but was determined to go back to work.

It was hard because of the terrible thing called “Mom guilt”.

It was hard because I ended-up apologising every time I had to leave slightly early or bang on time. But we survived….

………………………….

We were in India (where I am originally from) for the little one’s first year birthday. During one of the routine pediatric check-ups for my son, through a casual conversation, I told the doctor that my son had caught chickenpox from his nursery. She immediately blurted out a series of questions without any hesitation.

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“Why does he go to nursery at this tiny age? poor baby, why did you go back to work?”

Even though I just gave her a smile…

I wanted to tell her I went back to work because I love my job.

I wanted to tell her, work gives me a sense of value which is not connected solely to my family…

I wanted to tell her work makes me feel complete and that work is a part of life… well it is a good part of life…

I wanted to tell her I was trying to set a good example for my son!

………………………….

Just like any parent who goes to work, I miss my baby while at work, but work is very much my identity.

I am sure my son will understand why he has to go to the nursery while he could be at home playing ring-a-ring-a-roses with his “Amma”.

I am certain that my son will see that I am teaching him to be independent and brave.

I know my son will understand that a happy mom makes a happy family.

I am more than confident that my son will recognise why I go to work every day… to be the best “Amma” possible.

Earlier Published at Author’s Blog.

Image Source – Pixabay

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