Assault at Work Didn’t Stop Me From Rebuilding Career In My Middle Age

[ Rebuilding career after gap can be tough, a person needs to catch up to the latest trends in their field. Relearn and unlearn many things, and most importantly, regain confidence to seize the opportunity that comes their way. ]

I was forced to resign from my IT job in 2012 by my female manager, who vehemently yelled and screamed and assaulted me in her office because she was jealous of my abilities.

I hit rock bottom after that incident. Not only that, but I was in a state of shock and could not comprehend what was happening. My mind was switching on and off.

It’s the sadistic pleasure they get by putting a woman who is better than them down and bringing her down to her knees. I guess the plan was to trap me into a marriage and make me dependent on my husband. Most people are unhappy themselves and love to ruin another woman’s happiness and success.

Now I have come to realize why it is so difficult for a woman to advance in the IT sector in India. It’s mostly male dominated and women don’t stand a chance. Your male colleagues will find fault with something you say or do.  They will be waiting to criticize you.

As the saying goes, “People who find faults with others are most commonly blind to their own“. My corporate career has been a roller coaster ride of exploitation and abuse.

Rebuilding career in the field of one’s passion needs patience

I wish I could follow my passion and do something different, but I still need to pay my bills. I guess I am quite old-fashioned and needed to work at a full time job like my parents.

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Furthermore, I spent 6 years as a freelance writer after I quit my IT career in 2012. I had forgotten IT. I travelled all over in India and went to Nepal while freelancing.

Guess I am not that good a writer because I was not able to earn a lot of money with my travel writing. I never imagined that I would be rebuilding career to a full time job.

I was low on confidence and lacked the skills to get back to IT. Your degrees are of no use in this fast changing world.

Upskilling and relearning is part of rebuilding career from the scratch

I gave so many technical interviews with various companies where people younger than me would ridicule me for lack of skills, where I would get constantly rejected by the technical panel despite being an engineer.

I would commute long distance in buses to give a technical interview and get rejected. We can guess men in corporate world lack any form of empathy even in a country like India. Little did they know the mental trauma that I had been through in my previous workplace.

Finally, I ended up taking an online edtech course in web development. I worked on an unpaid internship just for the sake of learning in a small startup.

I worked 3 internships in really obscure little startups for a meagre salary. Likewise, I really had to get back up on my feet. I had none’s support except my ageing parents who do not know anything about corporates. Those were really hard times.

But I never gave up. I found a full time job after 6 months of internships. There were lakhs of people working for the company. Why did it take me so long to find this job?

I will never know.

At this point, I am happily settled in my full time job with one of the MNCs in Bangalore at their lowest band. I never want to go back to office to work.

It is okay to settle down in the rebuild career and not aspire for more

I enjoy working from home as it gives me a lot of privacy and space than sitting in a cubicle and having to endure maliciousness from jealous female managers and colleagues.

Women at the top don’t support women at the bottom. They would rather pull the ladder up with them when they reach the top than help their lesser sisters succeed.

But I have no ambitions to become a CEO or a leader. I have quit the rat race and am happy with where I am in life at this point, and try to do my best work.

I am happy taking myself out for coffee, movies, shopping, travel and pampering myself with luxury shampoos and spa treatments with my new-found financial freedom.

Not only that, but I believe in destiny. If my classmates are Managers, Directors and VPs in big corporates, maybe that was their destiny.

I do have an intense dislike for women who abuse power and authority to control and manipulate women under them and make them feel helpless.

Image source: Aramyan, via Getty Images, free on CanvaPro

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