A Thoughtful Man In Maharashtra Got His Widowed Mother Remarried

Yuvaraj Shele, a small-time worker from Kolhapur, Maharashtra, did battle many odds and arranged for his mother Ratna’s wedding a few weeks ago. The main point that he put forth was that he felt his mother was lonely and saw the need for her to live happily.

A myth that goes without saying is that only a woman can understand another woman better. What happens when a man does understand what a woman goes through? Especially when the woman is his mother, that too when she is a widow?

Yuvaraj Shele, a small-time worker from Kolhapur, Maharashtra, did battle many odds and arranged for his mother Ratna’s wedding a few weeks ago. The main point that he put forth was that he felt his mother was lonely and saw the need for her to live happily.

This scene does remind of a few movies/web series where the daughter/son do realize their mother’s emotions and towards the end, they approve of their new relationship.

But do women need permission to remarry?

Wait! Do mothers really need the permission of their son/daughter to get re-married? The question can remain unanswered.

This news is truly inspiring to read, considering the fact that Kolhapur is steeped in traditions, it is certain to serve as an eye-opener to the current generation. The idea empathized is that if the woman wants to stay alone, it is purely her choice and yes, let her be her.

On the other hand, if she wants to continue her life with another person again, it is her choice and that needs to be respected.

Because of societal expectations, decision to remarry was hard

In Shele’s case, the son could feel the emotional turmoil his mother was facing, and it was he who took up the decision of getting her remarried. His first step was convincing his mother itself. Of course, it wasn’t an easy task.

Starting from searching for the right groom and convincing his other family members, he did shoulder the entire responsibility. It was difficult for Ratna as well, though it had been five years after her husband’s demise.

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Later on, she was convinced as she asked herself this question if she wanted to live alone for the rest of her life. Through some known connections, Maruti Ghanwat was introduced to Shele and his family. After rounds of talking, the wedding was finalized. It was indeed a proud moment for Shele.

A father’s demise is inconsolable to the son/daughter, and at the same time stands the relationship of a husband to the wife.

Dear adult children

Please do not jump to the conclusion that mothers do need to live as a widower till their last breath. It isn’t necessary for them to open up on the topic of remarriage. In most cases, even if they feel, so they will definitely resist the thought.

Because of two reasons; one is fearing society, and the second is what if their own blood thinks worse about them? This stereotype needs to be broken. Parents are not only the pillar of their children. It is a reverse process as well.

Your job is to help them know about the choices mothers have

Again, it differs from one woman to another. While remarriage is considered to be a sensitive topic, a mother can have different thoughts as well.

  • She may like to go on a trip that would have never happened.
  • She may want to pursue a hobby or higher studies.
  • She may be interested in taking up a job.

If the children expect their mothers to move on, then stand by them and understand how it can be achieved.

An open talk, even multiple times if needed, can help define a prospectus future for her. A woman, though seen as a widow by the society, deserves to live happily.

Image source: Still from trailer of Salaam Venky, edited on CanvaPro

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