Calling Me A ‘Prostitute’ Doesn’t Make Me One!

Trigger Warning: This speaks of domestic violence, emotional abuse, and may be triggering to survivors.

“Visualize it. Just visualize it!”

Five-year-old Niranjana was finding it difficult to connect the colours, shapes, and alphabet together. She knew each of them separately, but connecting them together seemed huge and impossible. Tears overflowed her cute eyes when the teacher instructed her to learn at home and answer questions in class.

“What is it, my dear?” Rishi asked his angel, who descended from heaven.

“Papa, today the teacher scolded me for not answering her questions,” her face sank into sadness as she spoke.

“Why my sweetheart?” he patted her back gently and continued the conversation.

“A is for apple. Then the teacher asked me to tell objects the same color as an apple. I don’t know Papa,” she hugged him and replied.

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“Papa will teach you Niranjana. Now, look here. First, close your eyes.”

Niranjana followed her dad’s instructions.

“What color do you see?”

“Black Papa.”

“Okay, now you are seeing an apple. What color is it?”

“It is . . . red!”

“Now tell me something you see in red.”

“I can see a tomato, I can see a red rose.”

“That’s it, my girl, open your eyes now. See, you can connect colors and objects. Just close your eyes and see it through, then what you want to see will appear before you.” Rishi spoke excitedly.

“You are the best Papa!”

It is a simple trick that parents follow to help their children in learning. When Niranjana was in grade twelve, she understood the concepts through visualization. Though not the class topper, Niranjana was an above-average student and her academic side went by smoothly.

Niranjana joined as a professor and soon became the student’s favorite teacher. She loved to teach, especially the concept of visualization she learned from her dad. She believed in coaching students who were below par and those struggling to cross the minimum percentage. Her special attention to those students was appreciated by their parents and recognized by her college.

After seeking many alliances, Rishi finalized Niranjana’s wedding with Prabhu, a successful businessman. Niranjana readily agreed as she was her father’s princess who believed his Papa would have chosen the perfect man for her.

Prabhu was soft and gentle. Sometimes she couldn’t stop comparing him with his father in his care and concern as dad is always the first hero for a girl.

The nightmare then began.

Prabhu was short-tempered at times. The issue could be simple, or silly. If it touched his anger, in the next second it would reach its peak and he screamed. The first time when Niranjana spilled juice unknowingly on the floor, she almost fainted hearing his cuss words. While she couldn’t understand most of the word’s meaning, one word was etched into her mind.

“You’re a prostitute!”

That night she couldn’t sleep and her pillow took over her tears. The next day assuming Prabhu had calmed down, she asked him why he used such a word at her. He simply said it’s a man thing to talk about. Like nothing happened, he kissed her goodbye and left for work.

That one word began to play a trick on her mind. When she closed her eyes, his voice kept echoing in her ears. She began to visualize automatically. She felt many hands trying to touch her. Gasping for breath she screamed from her lungs opening her eyes. Why should her mind visualize something like this? She felt scared and kept to herself.

It wasn’t one time. Every time he got angry, he spew venom at her. At one stage she screamed back.

“Why me? I have never seen you talking this way with your mother or sister when you are angry. You can control your words with them, but not with me? Why on earth should you use that word to me?”

Slap! She got her answer.

“If you don’t want to hear that word, then ensure I don’t get angry.”

Niranjana thought that if she was perfect, then things would be better. She tried her best, but sometimes there was no specific reason why Prabhu was angry yet ultimately, she had to hear that word.

Finally, she gave up and returned to her father. He was a man as well but never had she heard him speak cuss words at least in front of her. To the world, the issue of their separation may seem simple or even nothing. It is verbal abuse and that can pain more than physical violence.

It may or may not be a man’s right to speak cuss words. But definitely, it is the right for a woman to stand against it. Women aren’t a place to dump a man’s anger no matter what the issue could be. And calling her names is again not the husband’s right just because they are married. Every woman needs her share of respect.

Author’s note: The woman mentioned above is not just Niranjana. She may have any name. Such incidents happen to many Niranjanas like her. Let us stand for it and end what may come.

Image source: a still from the series Made in Heaven

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