Why Is It Always A Mother’s Job?

She cried her frustration out, to find an outlet for all her exhaustion and anxiety. She texted her husband trying to make him understand.

Khushi looked at the multiple tabs opened on her laptop. There was so much to be done. And she had been on an on and off due to her child’s sickness. Today she was feeling drained and tired.

Was it due to her fatigue, consecutive sleepless nights, managing the emotional needs of the child, physical exhaustion due to running around the kid, mental anxiety of looking at her sick child? Or maybe the infection had finally been passed on to her.

It had been 7 days now since her daughter had been down with fever, cold and cough. After 2 days of patiently waiting for it to go away, they had to rush her to the hospital when the fever spiked to 103.5. It had been dreadful to see her quiet and down.

Mothers have a sense of empathizing with a child’s wellbeing. They can mirror their emotions and therefore when a child is sick, mothers are exhausted. Or is that so?

Kushi looked at her irritated child who was again complaining about ear pain. Then she looked back at the work in hand. Sigh!

She went to fetch the ear drops. It took another 30 minutes to convince her daughter to let her put them in.

She had always heard that the kids need their mothers when sick. True, but that also leads to mental, emotional and physical exhaustion for the mother. Dealing with a sick child is no easy feat.

Sickness had always made her anxious, and with her child sick Khushi always found herself worried and impatient. Being a strong, independent person since she was young, she had always wanted things in control. Having a sick child was just the opposite. And then there was this important webinar next week, and all the planning and schedules of the same had gone haywire.

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She had been missing meetings, deadlines, rescheduling calls. Hell, she had to take any and every call with a clingy child next to her.

And her husband had been going to office, meeting friends, prioritizing work. He did take a day off to take her to the doctor, she was reminded by her mother. Yes, and then he went off to meet their friends in the evening while Khushi stayed back to take care of the child.

There had been two anxious calls to her friend who had tried to calm her down.

It had been a long day, the fever had broken, husband was in office and Khushi was trying to complete some work. Between the medicines, eye drop, ear drop, and nasal drops and the convincing time for each of them, it looked impossible. Khushi applied for leave that day as well, she was not going to be able to do anything today as well.

A few episodes of friends might do some good. Netflix and chill with some much-needed coffee. Her husband came back finding her watching her beloved FRIENDS show.

“Please play with her for some time so that I can just sit for a while,” said Khushi. He nodded and went to play with his daughter.

“Can you give her the medicine?” she asked her husband, “while I finish an important call.”. Yes, he said but went back to his work. It was her daughter’s dinner time, and she would sleep soon. And he must be tired. So, Khushi went up to fetch the medicine and gave it to her daughter.

She went to finish her call.

After finishing her call, she had to put her daughter to sleep, her mom had fed her already, that was a relief. Her daughter half asleep, was rubbing her eyes already. She took her to bed and soon she was asleep. After so long, she would have a good night sleep, Khushi thought to herself. Or so she thought. Her daughter got up coughing and crying. She tried to put her back to sleep without any success. “Get the cough syrup,” she asked her husband “And the nasal spray.”

“It’s empty get the other one” said Khushi while consoling her irritated child.

“Why do you keep empty bottle, why can’t you just throw them?” exclaimed the husband irritably.

This was, ladies and gentlemen, the last straw.

“Why is it all my responsibility?!” Khushi exclaimed back. “Why do I have to remember to give her medicines, to keep stock of medicine, to calm her, console her and convince her?”

She was angry beyond belief, after doing everything, everything, she was being chastised for a small thing like this.

After her daughter was calm and had dozed off, she went to have dinner. She cried her frustration out, to find an outlet for all her exhaustion and anxiety. She texted her husband trying to make him understand.

“I literally couldn’t work the entire week. You wanted to meet your friend, I didn’t say anything, today also you went to office while I took care of her… I get exhausted emotionally, mentally and physically looking after her, Mom is also not well and so I am not bothering her that much. I must mentally remember what medicine, when to give her while also convincing her to take it, and then you come and tell me that I don’t do this and that. I have not slept properly for last one week, at least you can be a little emphatic.”

There was a silence and then the text came back. “I know you do so much, and I should understand and be more sensitive, I will do my best to support you, now take rest. Good night.”

And with that one small text she got a smile on her face and her eyes went heavy with sleep.

Image source: a still from Cutting Chai/ Modern Love Mumbai

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About the Author

Pragya Sugandha

Experimenting with experiences is the mantra of my life. Writing is a passion that helps me channel my emotions and recreate memories, publish points of view and create stories. A self-proclaimed creative soul, I read more...

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