Each Time I Lost A Little Bit More Of My Self…

Every time I listened to what ‘they’ told me, I lost a little more of my true self.

I wish I hadn’t looked back when…

They told me, you are a quiet child, when I was in kindergarten.

They told me, you need to speak more.

They told me, your heels are too high, when I was in high school.

They told me your skirt is too short.

They told me, basketball is for taller girls.

They told me to sit crossed legs, it makes you lady-like.

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They told me, girls and boys cannot be best friends.

They told me, solo trips aren’t for girls at all.

They told me that good marks will make your future bright.

They told me, good girls don’t dance like that.

They told me, do not do night shifts or “just change your job!”

They told me, a woman sacrifices for her family.

They told me not to stay alone in a different city.

They told me, don’t go out alone.

They told me, late nights and discos are bad for me.

They told me, hanging out with friends too much is not what girls should do.

They told me to get married soon.

They asked me, when are you going to have a baby?

They told me, don’t have more babies.

They told me, may be you could have more.

They told me, don’t talk about bold topics like sex and love.

They told me to be well dressed all the time.

They told me, to attain something, you have to lose something.

They told me, you ought to learn to cook.

They told me to eat a little more.

They told me to put on a little weight.

They told me, you look so good in dresses.

They told me, you should spend more time with us.

I wish I hadn’t looked back and listened to what they said.

Because each time I did, I just lost a part of my true self and was just being what they wanted me to be…

It was always about what they wanted and never about ‘ME’!

Top image is a still from the Hindi movie, Cocktail

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