What Do Porn Trends In India Tell Us About Indian Men?

Porn trends in India, especially among men, swing from pathetic to horrifying, and a common factor is a lack of consent. What does this say about Indian men?

A few years ago when a little girl was brutally raped and killed in Kashmir, the country and the world was rightly outraged. But the sick part was when people started searching for any available video of the act.

This sick mentality and sadistic tendency point to a deeper level of sexism and lack of respect for women’s dignity in the country.

A few days back when I looked at such videos to just check what the fuss is all about, my blood boiled. I just could not watch them, or imagine anyone enjoying videos of women being forced to have sex.

Most of these videos have a common thing where teenaged girls are kidnapped and forced to have sex or a husband forcing himself on the wife. These videos were so gut wrenching that even glimpses of one was enough to spoil one’s mood for a few days.

I know these are usually carefully written storylines with adult actors who are paid, and they do it out of consent. However, it shows the darkest nature of men in general who can even pay to watch such videos and acts. All those who watch this may not go and rape someone or sexually assault a woman but it shows a deeper hatred towards women and her ability to make a choice.

Effect of porn on real sexual relationships

A male friend had once remarked that such porn videos give many young men a very wrong idea of sex and consent. Without any knowledge on sex, relationship and consent, these young men develop skewed ideas about sex.

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As discussions around sex is a taboo, they think these videos are a reality. Many of them who marry or enter into relationships often expect their partner to ‘be a certain way’ and perform certain acts. They do things on the bed that their female partners may not consent to, but men think they are right in expecting it. Why? Because it happened on the porn videos on ‘forced’ and ‘dominating in bed’.

This dangerous trend is indeed worrying and the videos when viewed is disturbing enough, but once you are addicted, not only do you change as a man but so do your twisted expectations in bed.

A dangerous and concerning situation

The best way to check this is not by banning these videos, as it is impossible, and is an adult choice. What we can do is make sex education mandatory for our children in school, and talk to them at home too.

By telling them what is good sex is versus bad. How marriage and sexual relationships are beautiful when partners consent to any sexual activity, and there is an open communication between both, regarding each others’ expectations.

As for now, my women friends and I are still recovering from the shock of coming across the violent porn videos we clicked on when searching for what our male friends told us. We’re also disturbed about the possible effects on the psyche of young and teenaged males who watch them.

We, as a society, should be extremely concerned about this, and open a dialogue regarding ethical sexual behaviour for men, women and any other genders in between. Watching porn may not be bad, but these disturbing porn trends in India should deeply concern us as it affects many women inside the four walls of their homes.

Image source: a still from the film Baadshaho

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