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I have been called "Mom of the group" like a zillion times, and I am okay with it until you ask me to be someone else. It is just who I am. I just cannot stop caring about everyone.
Have you ever been called “Mom of the group”, just for being the level-headed and cautious one? Well, it is time we stop judging people who care sincerely!
As we move towards a feminist society, which means women having freedom to choose, why are we bashing up the ones who choose to be sincere and caring. I have been called “Mom of the group” like a zillion times, and I am okay with it until you ask me to be someone else.
It is just who I am.
I just cannot stop caring about everyone. I might be paranoid, and I might not be able to pull a night out with my friends.
Likewise, I might not be able to drink carefree and throw my arms over my friends. I do not tolerate sexist jokes and I speak out if I am offended. However, these things might have made me feel out of place a couple of times.
“Will it be safe and okay?” I asked one of my guy friends when we were planning to party one night.
“Why are you like this? You always have issues? Why can’t you be like her?” he referred to one of his other friends.
There is nothing wrong with me, and neither is with her. If she is not judged for drinking and dancing all night, then why am I judged for not doing this? I dance my heart out too, but I keep track of the time as well.
Is it that bad?
Feminism is about letting women choose. It is simply the freedom to do certain things without guilt like building a strong career, being ambitious and having crazy loads of fun as well. However, if we have accepted the women who have crazy loads of fun, why can’t we accept the ones who have moderate amounts of fun as well?
Coming back to my friend, I did confront him and told him that it is unreasonable for him to compare me like that. Well, he hasn’t since then, but I still sense the resentment in his tone when I question a fun plan.
In a nutshell, I do realize I can be a spoilsport sometimes, but it does not give anyone the right to keep comparing me with other girls who according to them are more fun. I am who I am, and I will not do something conflicting with my conscience just to look cool.
This might be a very simple topic to ponder about, but try asking someone like me the “Mom of the group”, and she will tell you how is it a sweet war every single day.
A war between trying to fit in and being true to what you are.
Image source: Still from BuzzFeed India’s Skit: When You’re The Mom Of Your Friend Group, edited on CanvaPro
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