Not Just Bengaluru, Not Just India: Women Deserve Every Street In The World

What is shocking about the statement of ministers who say that “this happens routinely” (“aisa hota hai”) is that it may just be echoing the minds of many who think women “ask for it”. These are minds that think the primary responsibility of women staying safe should lie with women – so basically, they should stay at home, or if they do step outside, they should be accompanied by a male member – NOT a boyfriend (as by that too, she is “asking for it” as boyfriends are a western concept?), but husband or another male family member. And they should dress “appropriately”.

But guess what – when individuals molest women or when mobs strike, that male person accompanying the woman cannot do anything. For that matter, even 1500 police can’t do anything when it is happening. After the incident, police are unable to catch the molesters, even though some of them may have their faces shown in the CCTV coverage.

And what about the women who are groped and molested just going about their daily work or studies? Nothing wrong with their clothes, but surely they must have given some kind of a “look” that invited groping and molestation?

We need media to cover this with greater insight

I titled my blogpost in 2015 as the Great Indian disease; knowing well that this does not happen only in India, I wrote about what I and many women face(d) in India. The intent is to ensure that people’s mind sets start changing among men and women. The intent is that people take molestation and rape seriously. The intent is that women start talking about the difficulties and insecurities they face with their body – because by talking about it, they will raise awareness. And hopefully people will not judge them as having “invited” a molestation, or “asked for it”.

This Singapore newspaper clip is of two Malaysian ladies who were molested at a party on New Year’s Eve at Sentosa. But in Singapore, men and women and girls and boys are safely traveling by public transport on a daily basis, or flocking to the streets in huge numbers for festive celebrations without groping incidents.

The same newspaper in Singapore has posted news of men who are sentenced to years of jail and caning for groping a woman’s breast, or a yoga instructor touching a woman’s upper thigh, or any kind molestation. Interestingly, in every news report, the picture displayed in the news is that of the molester and not of the victim. Each time the news is posted on the crime and on the criminal getting caught and sentenced, I believe it deters other criminals.

Women all over the world face the brunt of the show of power among men – through kidnapping and rape, molestation and violence. And it’s not okay anywhere in the world.

I feel sad when in so many forums outside India (not just by mainstream international media), incidents that take place against women in India get mileage. In addition to Indian mainstream media covering the Bengaluru molestation incident, the New York Times, The Guardian, Straits Times are among many who have covered this incident. As they cover other such incidents that occur in India. And each time, those living outside India and in India believe every woman in India has been or will be raped, or every woman who steps into any part of the country is a target of molestation.

One just needs to take a look at the comments in the local news, or discussions among locals to understand the extent to which India gets branded as the worst place for any woman. Which is not the case. India is a wonderful country with ample opportunity for women who shine and rise. Albeit just as in many places around the world, it is sad that the women in public spaces here too need to keep one eye (often both eyes and a sharp object at hand) on their whereabouts to ensure there is no untoward advance made toward them.

So dear Indian and international media, if you could please do away with the monikers and labels you are so enthusiastically doling out. Covering these incidents through sensational headlines and labels do catch eyeballs and are great click-baits for you. But please figure out how to balance out your news.

There is a lot to be done to ensure women can rightfully claim public spaces. That is why I support movements like #WhyLoiter where women are encouraged to step into and “loiter” in public spaces in large numbers to make it safer for them to be in them. We don’t need to be at home to stay safe; rather, more of us need to be out to ensure we are making it safer for ourselves and for other women in public spaces.

It is movements like these and many others, and conversations at home and in workplaces, in schools and in colleges, on a regular basis that will help change the mind set and establish a common understanding that women have a natural right to be safe in public spaces.

First published here

Image credit Surian Soosay, used under a Creative Commons license 2.0