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Even as we celebrated National Girl Child Day last week, it is imperative to acknowledge the harsh reality that many young girls around the world, and particularly in India, continue to suffer at the hands of traffickers.
Despite the progress made in various aspects of gender equality, the insidious crime of trafficking, fueled by the anonymity of social media, remains a pressing issue that demands our attention and action.
In recent years, social media platforms have become both a blessing and a curse.
While they provide a space for connection, awareness, and empowerment, they have also become a breeding ground for criminals engaged in the trafficking of young girls. The ease of communication and the cloak of anonymity that social media offers, has given traffickers a new and sinister tool to exploit vulnerable individuals.
National Girl Child Day is a reminder of the potential and promise inherent in every girl. Unfortunately, countless girls find themselves trapped in the web of trafficking, facing unimaginable horrors.
Poverty, lack of education, and societal inequalities make young girls particularly susceptible to exploitation. Traffickers often prey on these vulnerabilities, luring girls with false promises of a better life, education, or employment.
Social media platforms provide traffickers with an expansive reach, allowing them to connect with potential victims and carry out their nefarious activities discreetly. False identities, fake job offers, and deceptive promises are the tools of the trade, enabling traffickers to manipulate vulnerable girls into falling prey to their schemes. The virtual world, which should be a space for positive engagement, has unfortunately become a hunting ground for those seeking to exploit the innocent.
It is crucial for society to recognize the intersection of trafficking and social media and take collective action. Government agencies, law enforcement, and tech companies must collaborate to monitor and regulate online spaces. Stricter enforcement of laws against trafficking, along with increased awareness and education programs, can empower young girls to recognize and resist potential threats.
As we celebrate National Girl Child Day, let us recommit ourselves to creating a world where every girl is protected, educated, and given the opportunity to thrive. Empowering girls with education, providing economic opportunities, and fostering a supportive environment can help break the cycle of vulnerability that traffickers exploit. By addressing the root causes and collaborating across sectors, we can work towards dismantling the networks that perpetuate this menace.
National Girl Child Day serves as a poignant reminder of the rights and potential inherent in every girl. It is our collective responsibility to ensure that the celebration is not merely symbolic but translates into tangible action. By addressing the nexus of trafficking and social media, we can strive to create a world where the girl child is free from the clutches of monsters, ensuring a brighter and safer future for all.
Image source: a still from the film Amoli/ YouTube
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With less than six weeks to go now before we come to International Women’s Day 2024, I thought this would be the right time to look at this year’s IWD theme, Invest in Women. What does it mean for all of us, and especially for organizations across sectors looking to mark the occasion meaningfully?
The complete United Nations theme for International Women’s Day 2024 is Invest In Women: Accelerate Progress.
The rationale for this theme is painfully obvious. While people around the globe face challenges of poverty and conflict, women and girls often face the worst of it – for instance, even today in India, if money is scarce, it will be the women and girls who get the least part of an already poor diet. UN data also shows that despite a lot of rhetoric, organizations led by women and working for women get very limited financing – limiting their ability to create real impact.
If all of this feels remote – consider this – study after study shows that when the business climate is poor and layoffs are rampant, it is women who are disproportionately laid off, even in white-collar work environments.
Business leaders and decision-makers making plans to celebrate IWD need to consider if we are truly investing in women, or just making the right noises.
Over the years, here at Women’s Web, we have been part of the IWD celebrations and activities of many organizations. We’ve helped organizations think through the right things to do, to celebrate their female employees in a meaningful way, to build bridges to the societies they operate in, and to do it in interesting formats that connect people.
Some of these initiatives have worked remarkably well, others less so. Here are some of my learnings on what organizations that get it right do.
To invest in women, they include women! These organizations understand the importance of inclusion at a consistent, overall level and not just in terms of marking an individual day, important though that may be. They consult women on building safe and equitable workplaces that enable women to thrive, and build accountability for leaders to make this happen.
Given this context, IWD celebrations then become an occasion to deepen the conversation and take additional steps for the coming years.
While most of these are long-term efforts, International Women’s Day is a great time to evaluate any such programs your organization is running and announce any additions, upgrades, or expansions.
On the other hand, it is always tempting for overworked HR and Operations teams to treat the IWD theme of the year and IWD itself as just another item on the calendar to be ticked off. The initiatives that truly pay off in terms of women’s advancement at work often take years to show results; as a result, some organizations find it more appealing to take a shortcut and simply treat IWD as a celebration rather than the meaningful occasion it is.
In such cases, the International Women’s Day simply becomes a day to hand out roses, chocolates, spa vouchers or something of this nature to all your female employees. Now I am not against companies giving their employees of any gender something fun and enjoyable; however, let’s be clear that these goodies are just that – a little something to be enjoyed that day and forgotten. Neither do they advance women’s careers in the workplace in any meaningful way, nor do they further organizational goals such as building more women up to be leaders or reducing attrition among employees.
If we want IWD to be a milestone each year that actively furthers both women’s growth at work and organizational goals such as lower attrition or inclusive and collaborative workplaces, there is a lot more work to be done than just handing out the roses!
So, as we approach International Women’s Day 2024, let’s truly reflect on the theme, Invest in Women, and ask ourselves what it means to us. Whether as individuals, team leaders, business leaders, HR leaders or in any other capacity, how do we want to use this occasion to build women up? Can we approach the occasion as one step in our long-term goals to create inclusive workplaces where everyone can bring their best selves, rather than as an event to celebrate and forget?
Image source: ciiblog.in
46-year-old Sreedevi from Kerala has defied all odds and made herself financially independent. Married with two children, she took a leap of faith to contribute to her family’s earnings while pursuing her passion. Her journey is an inspiration to women seeking financial independence and self-worth.
In this WomensWebXMahilaMoney impact series, we bring you entrepreneurs like Sreedevi who had not just the ambition to grow, but took the steps needed to bring their dreams to fruition. Apply for a loan of up to 25 lakhs to fuel your business growth by downloading the Mahila Money App on Google Playstore or visiting the website here.
Sreedevi, a B.Com graduate, was at a crossroads when she had to leave her job at an insurance company to care for her ailing mother-in-law. Fueled by a desire to contribute to her family’s well-being and inspired by her husband’s dedication, she embarked on an entrepreneurial journey in tailoring.
Reflecting on her challenges, Sreedevi shares, “After my husband had to return home from working abroad due to a family emergency, he started his salon in our hometown. He taught me that no work is too big or small to provide for our family. This motivated me to start something of my own and support our family’s needs.”
Driven by her creative passion, Sreedevi fearlessly established her small, home-based tailoring business, catering to the needs of her neighbours, friends, and relatives. She shares with determination, “I aimed to utilise my skills and time while also looking after my mother-in-law and managing household responsibilities. Tailoring proved to be the perfect fit for me.”
As fate would have it, Sreedevi’s decision to pursue her entrepreneurial venture brought financial stability and had an unexpected positive impact on her family.
With her daughter happily married and her son residing abroad, Sreedevi had ample time to oversee her business operations while caring for her mother-in-law. “Interestingly, my mother-in-law’s health began to improve when customers started visiting our home to place their orders,” Sreedevi reveals with a smile. “The constant buzz of customers infused our household with energy and liveliness. It turned out to be a blessing in disguise.”
For six years, Sreedevi stitched garments, catering to the unique preferences of her customers. However, she realised she needed additional resources to expand her business and meet the growing demands. Sreedevi, a Kudumbashree all-women self-help group member in Kerala, believed hiring two fellow members would benefit her business and also support other women. “I wanted to create opportunities for more women in our group and help them become financially independent. I believe we could achieve great things together,” Sreedevi shares, her eyes shining ith hope.
For business expansion, she needed two additional power sewing machines. To obtain the necessary capital for her business, Sreedevi turned to Mahila Money, a trusted financial platform dedicated to providing capital solutions to women entrepreneurs. After submitting all the required documents, Sreedevi was delighted when her loan of INR 40,000 for 12 months was approved.
With the loan, Sreedevi wasted no time acquiring two additional sewing machines and hiring two skilled ladies from her self-help group. Prior to obtaining the loan, she solely relied on stitching work, taking orders from anyone who happened to walk into her home-based shop. But after the loan, she could expand her business and started selling online. Sreedevi acquired the necessary materials, skilfully designed and tailored garments, then showcased her creations through her WhatsApp status and on Instagram. “I started promoting my designs on social media and, to my surprise, received a good response. This was something new for me, and I enjoyed catering to different sets of customers”, says Sreedevi with a smile.
Not only did Sreedevi’s business experience remarkable growth, but she also generated employment for two more women in her community. She paid them per piece and day-wise, ensuring they received fair compensation for their valuable work. Sreedevi also had a backup staff to manage high-volume orders, particularly during festive seasons.
“My fellow entrepreneurs and I work together as a team, supporting each other and sharing our knowledge. It’s a wonderful feeling to uplift one another,” Sreedevi reflects, a touch of pride evident in her words.
The business flourished, and Sreedevi’s monthly profits almost doubled, reaching an impressive 18,000 rupees from 10,000 rupees. “The loan from Mahila Money changed everything for me. It provided the boost I needed to expand my business and increase my income significantly. I am forever grateful,” Sreedevi explains, her voice brimming with gratitude.
With her success and dreams of expansion, Sreedevi aspires to open her shop and hire additional staff to meet the growing demand. “I want to create a thriving business that not only supports my family but also supports more women in my community. Mahila Money has shown me that no dream is too big or out of reach,” Sreedevi concludes, her voice filled with hope and ambition.
Sreedevi’s transformative journey showcases the incredible impact of Mahila Money’s support, allowing women to rise above challenges and create a brighter future for themselves and their communities. Her #JiyoApneDumPe story encourages women to pursue their passions, embrace entrepreneurship, and envision a world where they are agents of change.
If you are a #JiyoApneDumPe woman entrepreneur who wants to take your business to new heights and needs working capital and entrepreneurship resources, get in touch with the Mahila Money team today.
Ranbir Kapoor’s win as the Best Actor (popular choice) for Animal as opposed to his fellow nominees like Ranveer Singh from Rocky Aur Rani Ki Prem Kahani, Sunny Deol from Gadar 2 or even Vicky Kaushal from Sam Bahadur at the 69th FilmFare Awards comes in as a harsh slap on the face of all of us who have vehemently protested against this film or his performance.
This win just goes on to prove how our society is shaped and influenced by a severe dose of misogyny and adverse patriarchy. His win not only celebrates his choice of portrayal of such crude, toxic male protagonists but it also justifies the psychological conditioning of men like Sandeep Reddy Vanga for whom bloodshed, patriarchy or violence is the only form of entertainment that he has to offer. His narcissistic behavior towards his own male leads or his films overshadows the goodness of characters like Rocky Randhawa who in spite of being raised as a male chauvinist wishes to become the flag bearer of change that celebrates men and women in the same breath.
It’s unbelievable that a character like Ranvijay Singh of Animal could be watched and rewatched to an extent that it now gets aired on Netflix whereas films like Annapoorni gets pulled down because it violates the so-called religious beliefs of some sections of the society.
Sandeep Reddy Vanga has been known to make films that are high on shock tactics and low on substance so just like Arjun Reddy and Kabir Singh, Animal too is a story of extremely misogynistic and violent men. The latest one goes ahead and sinks even further into regressive depths resulting on Ranbir Kapoor projecting one of the vilest protagonists to have ever graced the silver screen.
As starkly opposed to this we have Meghna Gulzar painting a beautiful representation of the first Field Marshall of India. Sam Manekshaw or as commonly addressed as Sam Bahadur.
Here’s a man who stands as the fiercest opponent at the war front yet plays the most supportive and loving husband to his wife Silloo Borde and an equally responsible father to his daughters Sherry and Maya. At a time when it’s all about portrayal of extreme jingoistic narratives that outweighs political leadership as compared to the military maneuvers, Meghna Gulzar’s war biopic depicts a tale of true valor the encapsulates the life of a hero whose contributions have not been celebrated enough in popular culture.
Ranbir Kapoor’s win also makes us question the role of Rocky Randhawa, a character chalked out by Karan Johar who was once called out repeatedly and consistently for his vain, ostentatious and hollow scripts. One cannot help appreciate and applaud Johar for his portrayal of Rocky Randhawa who is a welcome change from a typical Bollywood narrative of a hero or a male protagonist. As per the Indian society a man is expected to hide his emotions especially the unpleasant ones, but Rocky is comfortable wearing his heart on his sleeve as well as shedding a tear when his heart bleeds. He doesn’t flinch at insults rather accepts his ignorance and aspires to learn from them. Here is a man who is termed as the perfect “green flag” in the Gen Z lingo, and is not afraid to fail because he knows he would resurrect himself in the best possible manner the next instant.
The celebration of a violent male protagonist makes us the question the real meaning of a hero-who is he? Is the one who depicts an act of courage? Or someone who inspires love and adulation amongst the masses?
Thus the success of Ranbir Kapoor truly sparks a debate (at least amongst the discerning ones) about the contrasting ideas of manhood in Bollywood which has more takers for Animal’s toxic masculinity than the larger than life heroism of Sam Bahadur or the vulnerability of Rocky Randhawa.
This also speaks about the society’s interest in a subject that is as lame as a man making his wife listen to a black box recording of the first time they had sex in his private jet as compared to something as chivalrous as a field Marshall who charmingly woos his to-be wife or volunteers to open car doors for ladies.
Men like Vanga choose to relate with their characters-he unabashedly justifies a scene where Kabir slaps his girlfriend Preeti, “There’s love between the two. If you don’t have the liberty of slapping each other, then I don’t see anything there.”
Faiz Ullah, Assistant Professor at the Tata Institute of Social Sciences, Mumbai mentions, “Filmmakers like Vanga are determined to reverse whatever little gains one has seen regarding gender inclusion and the complexity of representation in the recent past”. He calls it a “visceral reaction” to the traction that feminist and social justice movements have been able to create around issues of equality, inclusion, dignity and justice, most recently after #MeToo.
Whether it is Ranvijay Singh of Animal or the real celebrity Ranbir Kapoor’s win at the much coveted FilmFare awards it’s puts us in a conundrum as to who we choose to be our real hero in today’s time. Is it someone who gives their life at the border or the one who reprimands his wife to lick his shoes is only for time to tell!
‘Are you out of your mind? Do you still have dreams to chase? Do you think you will be able to get a job and build your career at this age? Do you think you can do business and make money at this point in life? When people think of leading a hassle-free life and striving for peace and quietude, you want to invite problems and make your lives difficult. When people voluntarily retire and prefer spending time with their family and grandchildren you want to build your career? Have you completely lost it? “Gharwale kya sochenge” (what our family would think)? On top of that “log kya kahenge” (what people would say)?’
‘Stepping out of the home and doing business is not a child’s play. You have to put time, effort and money into it and then also success is not guaranteed. You will have to be dedicated like hell and yet you can see no results. There is a lot of risk involved in this. Why do you want to lose peace and sanity of your mind at this age? Why do you want to jeopardize the harmony and peace of your life? Why do you want to buy trouble and open a can of worms?’
Several voices raised their concern.
But I was adamant and hell-bent to do something on my own, something of my choice. which I had dreamed of for a long. Dreams don’t have an expiry date and age is not such a yardstick to decide who can see dreams. So what if I am nearing fifty? I don’t want to give up on my dreams and want to rise to my full potential.
I was good at cooking especially Indo-Chinese cuisine. Whenever I made chowmein, gobhi manchurian, it turned out to be finger-licking good. People often appreciated my proficiency in cooking and complimented me saying you should open a restaurant.
I knew opening a restaurant was a bit too much to think about. So I started with baby steps. I announced in my friends’ circle and in my local girl’s groups especially to those where husband and wife both were working that I prepare delicious home-style healthy food and they can pick it up on their way back home every day or can order anytime. I assured them it would be as good as their homemade food and would cost them reasonably low. It is just that they have to order in advance since I am new in the business.
I got my menu printed and distributed it among all my acquaintances and posted it on social media as well.
I asked my sons to spread the word among his friends who were staying away from home and studying in college that they could contact me for their weekly or monthly tiffin as we serve home-style protein-rich food made with fresh and quality ingredients.
I knew patience was the key. I held onto determination and dedication, bought all the necessary ingredients and waited for my first order earnestly.
Two-three weeks passed but nothing happened. I kept my eyes on the mobile but I didn’t receive any notifications regarding the order from there either.
One day my son came and said that one of his friends needed food for a week as his food provider would be closed for a week for some family emergency.
I knew this was a golden opportunity for me. I grabbed it with both hands and delivered him healthy and fulfilling food at a competitive price. Not to mention he liked the food and decided to stick with my menu as it benefited him both quantity and quality-wise. I told him if he recommended my tiffin to his other friends, the weekend meal would be free for him. Information was passed down by word of mouth. By the month’s end, I had conquered five students who signed up for their monthly tiffin service with me. In the meantime, couple of my acquaintances also contacted me and ordered their food.
I completed all the legal formalities and officially named my catering service “A Pinch Of Taste”.
I also advertised that I take orders for small get-togethers and birthday parties. Soon I bagged my first catering order from my husband’s colleague. He had organized his son’s birthday party and ordered 25-30 people’s food.
I prepared mawa gulab jamun and gajar ka halwa in dessert one day in advance. It was a little strenuous for me but my mother-in-law stepped in and offered her helping hand. It fueled my enthusiasm multifold and my happiness knew no bounds. It was a weekend. My kids also popped in. “Many hands make the light work.” I made gobhi Manchurian and paneer teeka with red and green chutney for starters. Keeping kids in mind I made pav bhaji veg biryani and paired it with raita, gravy and protein salad for the main course.
The food was ready by the evening. We packed the food appropriately and delivered on time. I was on cloud nine when they placed the payment on my hands. It was my first earning. I jumped for joy and felt proud of myself. Though the amount was small I felt a sense of accomplishment that transcended its monetary value. It was not just money for me, it was a dream come true. It not only brought me a sense of financial independence but also boosted my self-esteem and confidence. The feeling of contributing to my financial well-being and even to my family was empowering. Boom….I had nailed it.
Image source: YouTube/ short film Everything is Fine
Today, two of my dear friends got married. I wish them lots of love and happy tidings. I know there will be ups and downs, laughter and tears, arguments and making up, but watching them I realise the joy when shared surely is doubled.
It seems like the other day when I got married, I was still in college, pursuing my graduation in Microbiology, a supposedly bright student. It would be wrong to say my parents wanted to see me settled soon because I was equally interested in ‘settling down’ and being so much ‘in love’. Ours was a traditional ‘Love marriage’ approved of by the parents and families.
Over the years we had our share of arguments and reconciliations. But we grew up. We realised we were not the people we imagined the other to be. Being up close shows us more faults than when we see someone from a distance. Being on our best behaviour and clothes for a few hours in a day versus, living in close proximity 24 x 7 has more chances of noticing annoying but realistic habits like nose digging, belching and flatulence.
And I haven’t even come to where one wants tea while the other wants coffee.
As we walk together it is important to keep up with one another else, we grow but probably at different levels and pace. Then we just grow apart. So holding hands is important… to keep abreast.
Often, I was told it’s the person I am that matters, being kind, generous, loving etc. But I have often noticed if both people in a marriage are not following the same guidelines, one may take advantage of the other, taking these qualities for granted and years later arguments increase as the feeling of being taken advantage is akin to being cheated.
For the sake of my marriage, I prioritized my spouse, my kids, and my family duties. For the sake of my marriage, today I have learned to prioritize myself.
So, though ‘Marriage’ is a wonderful institution and brings some of the greatest joys let’s be practical and remember- to stay together we need to work on it together.
Image source: by FatCamera from Getty Images Signature Free for Canva Pro
The gavel’s sound in the Court resonated not only within the courtroom but also in wider conversations about social standards and the changing face of equality in modern India.
“Obligatory For Woman To Serve Elderly Mother-In-Law, It Is A Part Of Indian Culture; Demand To Live Separately Is Unreasonable’: Jharkhand HC”
The latest news reports state that the Jharkhand High Court in India has noted that serving elderly people (i.e., mothers-in-law or grandmothers-in-law) is both a cultural custom and a duty for Indian women. In its ruling, the court cited Article 51A of the Indian Constitution, which addresses citizens’ basic obligations, among which is “to value and preserve the rich heritage of our composite culture.” It further cited passages from the ancient Hindu text called Manusmriti that describe the obligations and responsibilities of each member of society. It described taking care of one’s elderly in-laws as a customary practice in Indian culture.
A husband’s appeal against a family court order directing him to give his wife Rs 30,000 and his son Rs 15,000 a month was being heard by the court. The woman declined to live with her husband without a valid reason, so the High Court determined that she was not liable for maintenance.
In 2018, the wife had moved out of her married house. The husband then claimed that the wife had forced him to leave the family home and had refused to care for his mother and maternal grandmother in his filing for judicial separation under the ‘Hindu Marriage Act‘.
Conversely, the woman claimed that she was tortured and subjected to cruelty by her husband and in-laws in exchange for a dowry. She did not, the court ruled, have a “legitimate reason” to live apart from her family.
The news has highlighted the delicate and complicated nature of gender dynamics within the judicial system.
A woman has her own life to live. She has her parents, her professional goals, and her health to take care of. These kinds of “obligations” totally ignore the commitments a woman may have. Doesn’t the mandate contradict laws protecting women, like the Domestic Violence Act, which works to safeguard daughters-in-law’s rights and welfare in married households? It’s especially difficult in situations when these responsibilities could be used as an excuse for disrespect. They could lead to a daughter-in-law tolerating exploitation, harassment, and physical or emotional abuse. Women can find it extremely difficult to exercise their legal rights when cultural expectations conflict with these legal safeguards.
Society’s guidelines are shaped by the long-standing traditional gender roles in India. A woman is responsible for taking care of the children and handling household chores.
A man is expected to provide the majority of the family’s income. There is the idea that girls should be caring and obedient, while boys should be courageous and assertive. Without a doubt, a majority of the population supports the idea that women should primarily be caregivers and that men should be the breadwinner of the family.
A survey by the Pew Research Center (2022) included 29,999 Indian adults from 26 states and three union territories. The results concluded that although 62% support shared childcare duties, 34% continue to support women serving as the primary caregivers. Furthermore, 54% are in favor of both sexes having incomes. The study revealed that Indian men tend to hold slightly more conservative opinions than women.
Society and its expectations of women need to change. These norms can be problematic because they perpetuate inequality within the familial framework by placing an undue burden on women. Regrettably, we run the risk of sustaining an atmosphere that normalizes abuse and exploitation by forcing adherence to conventional gender roles.
The Manusmriti and cultural norms are invoked in the court’s ruling affecting specific instances while underscoring broader problems with gender inequality. A precedent of this nature can lead to an unequal power relation in families and society. The ruling strengthens discriminatory behaviors. It feels like the initiatives to advance women’s rights are hit by a bulldozer.
We as a society must acknowledge and preserve social norms. But we should also prioritize upholding the values of human rights, gender equality, and individual autonomy. It is 2024 and women need to have the freedom to choose their education, career, personal well-being, or whatever they wish. The HC decision has sparked a wider conversation about the consequences of such rulings for women’s rights.
What is your take on the matter?
Image source: YouTube/ short film Ghar ki Murgi
Annapoorani!
Yet another massive women-centric movie from the Lady Superstar, actress Nayanthara. After receiving a positive response with a bit of criticism, the movie made its screen time well in the theatres. After the usual running days, the movie landed on the OTT platform.
A sudden forest fire swept through. There were many comments, videos, and posts that said the heroine of the movie had hurt religious sentiments.
There were many interesting facts in the movie that can be looked upon.
– It was not easy for a girl who in her childhood decided to follow her passion as her career too being born and brought up in an orthodox family in south Tamil Nadu. – Every frame shows how she is dedicated to achieving her goal – Yes, there are obstacles in every step of hers, but it is the visuals of how she overcomes them are to be applauded. – She learns and keeps learning in her journey throughout. She is keen on knowing every single detail. – Humiliation, and demotivation, all together pressurizes her and squeeze out all the positive ends but somewhere someone, some situation gives a ray of hope. Catching up with that thin light in the darkness, she continues to struggle. – It is difficult to adapt to different food habits. It was also an obstacle for her. Being committed to her career, she took it up as a challenge as it only benefited her to improve her skills. – Even towards the end, she paves the way for others to move ahead in their lives. When a woman achieves, she doesn’t stop there. This was an excellent move to showcase even in reality how women help one another.
The only point that stood out was she followed another religion’s customs for her cooking skills to be perfect. It is hurting religiously and so on.
The outcome was so high that the lady superstar finally posted an apology letter to the media. Isn’t this worrisome?
Actress Nayanthara’s acting path itself makes a long success story. Today, she is one of the topmost heroines and yes she does have it in her. Personally and officially she did face hurdles, and yet today she stands as a proud woman donning many roles.
Even in this movie, she lived the character of ‘Annapoorani’. In each frame of the cooking scene, it is hard to believe she was enacting it. It was not her script. This move stands as another feather in her crown.
Sad that she had to apologize for the controversy that arose(unwantedly?). For her stardom stature, it was not needed, yet she proved her magnanimity and gave a heartfelt apology.
How much ever society is keen to throw briquettes at women who achieve greater heights, we women only hit a six.
In the quiet corners of our lives, where routines unfold and stories remain untold, there lies the potential to make a significant impact. This is a tale of how a seemingly ordinary encounter with our household maid unfolded into a powerful narrative of empowerment and transformation.
Our maid, a resilient woman in her fifties with four children, faced the typical challenges of balancing familial responsibilities with work. As time passed, knee pain took its toll, leading her to delegate the night duties to her daughter. One day, during a momentary pause in her chores, I curiously inquired about this young girl’s daytime activities.
To my surprise, she revealed that she was on the brink of completing her college education. This revelation sparked an idea – an opportunity to make a difference in her life. We offered her the chance to learn computers, a proposition she greeted with enthusiasm. As she mastered the digital realm, an unforeseen path unfolded before her.
Upon completing her computer training, she secured a job at the local passport office, specializing in file checking and data entry. This newfound employment not only allowed her to contribute significantly to her family’s financial well-being but also instilled in her a sense of empowerment.
However, life’s twists and turns are unpredictable. The local passport office faced closure due to its temporary location. In a bid to support her during this transitional period, we invited her to join our office. This decision not only marked the beginning of her professional journey but also became a turning point in her life.
Early mornings saw her assisting us in our office, and she returned in the evenings to diligently manage our household chores. Witnessing her dedication and eagerness to learn, we extended another opportunity – to learn Tally, a skill that would further enhance her employability.
As time unfolded, her journey took an unexpected turn. A well-educated suitor entered her life, and she embarked on a new chapter in Dubai. Today, that once-aspiring young woman holds a senior managerial position in a multinational corporation.
This story is not just about empowering one woman but about the ripple effect that empowerment can create. It’s a testament to the idea that, given the right opportunities and support, individuals can transcend their circumstances and achieve remarkable heights. In the small gestures of offering a chance to learn, we witnessed the transformative power of empowerment, shaping not just a career but an entire destiny.
The crowd stood up to give a standing ovation as Sanjana B finished her stand-up comedy show.
Mala was clapping, but her face had a set smile.
“Didn’t you like it?” Pranali asked.
“Yes, I did.” Mala nodded.
“Then why so glum?” Pranali asked.
“I was just distracted. The show was good.”
“You know Mala, you should try stand-up comedy too. With your wacky sense of humour, you will be a hit.” Pranali said.
“What rubbish. I’m not that funny. And writing a funny script is tough work”
“You are nuts. Remember that one-man show you had done in college? It was hilarious. You won at all the college festivals!
“We were kids then. It’s all changed now. Things are far more complicated now”
“The ability to write well and be creative doesn’t change Mala.”
“ There are too many stand-up acts now. I missed the bus.” Mala sighed.
“In fact, it’s easier now with social media.” Pranali persisted
“Let it be Pranali. Let’s eat. I’m hungry.”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with you. Lately, I’ve noticed you are less enthusiastic about things. I miss your bubbly spirit. Something bothering you?”
“No, no. It’s called old age.” Mala laughed it off.
“You are just evading my questions Mala. Let me know if you want to talk it over.”
Back home, Mala mulled over Pranali’s words. What had changed in the last few years? She switched on her laptop and looked at the story she had been meaning to submit to a competition. It was almost complete but she had missed the submission date. Now there was no point finishing it. Besides, it was sure to get rejected. She turned to her cat. “Spark, add one more thing to the wasteland of untried and abandoned projects. I hate contests but I will finish my Inktober drawing and upload it on Insta. Today is the last day. I will not default on this. And please get off my sketchpad.”
She loved drawing and had been participating in Inktober for the last 5 years. It was an online challenge where you had to do 30 days of ink drawings in October. It was one of two challenges she did each year. The other one was NaPoWriMo where you wrote 30 poems in April. Both these had no prizes and you could post your drawings and poems on social media if you desired. There was no compulsion. Mala loved creating something new every day without pressure and these two challenges worked well for her.
She posted her work on Instagram and got around 30 Likes on her posts. She was happy that a small set of people enjoyed her creations. Her friends had been urging her to compile her drawings and poems into a book. But who bought poetry books? The unsold books would have to be converted into side tables. Better to enjoy the instant gratification Insta gave her. Besides, she didn’t want to submit her manuscript to various publishers and deal with the rejections.
She felt the stirring of another idea. Maybe she could combine her drawings and poems into a calendar as a new year gift for her friends and family. She uploaded her latest drawing and went to bed happy with her idea.
***
The next day Mala started choosing the poems and drawings she liked. She was interrupted by her cousin Latika who had come to invite her to her anniversary party.
“Congratulations!” Mala embraced her favourite cousin.
“Thanks, Didi. Atul’s friends still remember the wedding card you designed for us.”
Mala blushed at the praise.
“After that, you also designed Reema’s engagement card and the baby shower invite for Roma, didn’t you? Didi, you are so talented and a natural at design. Why didn’t you pursue it? You could have quit your job and started a design studio instead.”
“Stop it, Latika!” Mala said brusquely, and Latika, taken aback by the sudden outburst looked hurt.
After a minute she asked, “Is something the matter, Didi?”
“Nothing Latika. I’m sorry. I get bugged when told I am talented, gifted, creative, blah blah; repeatedly. What is the point of these gifts? I waste them anyway. Am I even talented? You know my neighbour Sona right? We started learning to paint together. I gave up but she went on and now look at her, having exhibitions while I muddle around happy with my 30 likes from you all.”
“Are you jealous, Didi?”
“Of course not! I am not jealous but I do envy people like her for their tenacity. All I have are regrets and vague ambitions.”
“What changed Didi? You were always full of ideas but now I see that hardly anything excites you.
Mala hesitated a bit but then spoke up. “I feel something stops me from doing anything. I feel I am looking out at the world through a glass cage. I pick up things and abandon them. I guess I am just bored.” Mala finished lamely.
“It’s probably a low phase Didi. We all go through that. Check your vitamin levels. I suggest you pick up a small project and do it. You will feel happy.”
“I guess you are right. I am planning a calendar with my drawings and poems. ”
“Wow how cool! That’s the spirit. One for me Didi, don’t forget. I got to rush. See you soon.”
After Latika left, Mala felt bad about her outburst. “What is wrong with me Spark? Why am I acting like a grumpy old woman? I better get down to this calendar.”
By November end Mala had whittled it down to 25 poems and drawings. She looked at the printouts sprawled over the dining table. Spark was sitting on half of them. “Hmm. all this is too much work. And seems a bit self-indulgent and show-offish. Plus, weekends are busy with all the NRIs visiting. And then the last week of December is the Goa trip. You know what Spark? I think I will do the calendar next year. Now I will only end up doing a shoddy job” Spark merely looked away.
She felt a stab of disappointment at her decision. Tears welled up but she couldn’t understand why. To get away from the feeling she started scrolling Insta, her go-to amusement.
The amazing thing about Insta was that she merely had to think of something, and it showed her related content and ads. Now she started seeing ads for calendars She could have made one as good as some of them but she had given up. Why was she such a loser?
One calendar caught her eye. It was titled ‘Emerging from the Shadows.’ The artist had made drawings that showed a woman slowly unfurling like a bud and reaching for the Sun. The description said, “I finally accepted my anxiety and now am prepared to live again, fearless and free.”
She was crying now, “Spark, look at this woman. She had anxiety and she overcame it. I don’t have any problems and yet I’m not able to finish anything. When did I become such a procrastinator?
She continued scrolling, wallowing in her misery.
An ad popped up.
“Are you guilty of procrastinating?” It read.
Yes, she nodded.
She swiped to the next slide. “Do you feel helpless about this?” “Yes!” she sobbed, startling Spark off the bed.
She swiped. “Then you need help.”
She stopped, stunned. Could it be that something was going on internally that she was not aware of? Was she going crazy or something? How could that be? She was Mala, the talented multi-faceted person. That could not happen to her.
Out of curiosity, she clicked on the ad. She learned procrastination was linked to anxiety. She searched anxiety and it led her to a whole spectrum of mental health issues that she had no clue about. All the articles she read made one thing clear. She did not have to feel guilty about her feelings of defeat and lack of motivation. Many people were suffering like her. But there was help available. She only had to seek it out.
She sent Pranali a text message, “Call me when you wake up. Have something exciting to talk to you about.”
She picked up Spark and looked her in the eye. “Yes, this is what I am going to do in the new year, Spark. Ask for help to figure out what I need to do to get to the real me that seems to have gone missing somewhere. Maybe I need to talk to a therapist, maybe I need medication. I don’t know. But you know what? I’m not ashamed to ask for help and I’m not afraid to take the steps that will help me to do all that I have stayed away from. You can come with me to give me company.
2024 is going to be my year. I will not be stopped.” Spark blinked and licked her nose.
Image source: by MStudioImages from Getty Images Signature Free for Canva Pro
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