Malayalam Film Aattam Deftly Unmasks The Rape Culture Inherent In The Average Modern Man

Posted: March 18, 2024

Was fortunate enough to catch this masterpiece over the weekend. The movie is titled Aattam, it’s in Malayalam and streaming on Amazon Prime Video.

There’s no spoiler alert here because I won’t reveal too much, especially the twist halfway or the finale. All I’m trying to convey with my post is, why it’s important that we all give the movie a try.

Rarely do such gems appear in Indian cinema, mature and thought-provoking. The movie is about a theatre group comprising 12 men and 1 woman. The woman is also romantically involved with one of the actors.

*NO Spoilers*

So this one time, they halt for the night at a resort, and one of the men gropes the woman in the dead of the night. Being dark outside, she fails to see the face, but she kind of knows who he is. Not sure how to go about it, she confides to her beau, who then calls for a meeting with other actors, trying to push his agenda of kicking the alleged perpetrator out of the group. This meeting, their discussions, their disagreements, and the revelation of their mentalities, are what form the crux of Aattam.

All modern men, yet…

What works for Aattam, is how subtly it unmasks various layers of patriarchy, in a so-called modern and urban society. The men in the theatre group are educated, liberal, fathers to daughters, and when they meet initially, they all seem to agree upon one thing, respect the lady’s dignity and punish the offender.

But then, they are large in number, and each has his own opinion. Plus, the man in question, the alleged molester, is popular and successful, which helps to keep him in the group. And gradually, the thought of punishment begins to vanish, and the decree of punishment dilutes to furnishing an apology. Counter questions are posed, and as the story progresses, the woman finds herself amidst a barrage of accusations, sugar-coated, but bang on target.

Wasn’t she drunk that night? Weren’t her clothes too revealing? Why does she mingle freely with men? So she hadn’t seen him? Had she been hallucinating?

The woman is seemingly confused, she is not very comfortable talking about it to a large group. But her beau forces her to, and she finds herself interrogated by men whom she once trusted and considered friends.

What about her very real experience of assault?

In the entire process, not one of them seems to be bothered about the fact that, “If not him, then who?” Yes, she didn’t see him clearly, but the perpetrator was one of them. But all that seems important is, why is the woman lying, accusing someone when she isn’t sure.

Aattam is a simple depiction of how, in a supposedly emancipated society in the 21st century, most men still consider women as the custodians of Maryada, torchbearers of discipline and character. They can seek pleasure outside marriage, but when questioned, they wouldn’t stand with the other woman either. And of course, no guesses about who is to blame when a man leaves his family.

Which brings me back to my question. How do we shatter this patriarchy, the deeply etched thought in many minds that, He Rapes Because She Leads Him On? Maybe, by talking to our sons, about equality and respect. By meting out the same treatment to our sons, that we give to our daughters. By telling them, they too are torch bearers of Maan Maryada. By watching movies like Aattam with your sons, showing them, what it is, to Be A Man first, and Not an Alpha Male.

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‘It’s All Because My Clients Believed In Me’ Says Jahnabi Phukan Of The Salon Business She Grew!

Meet Jahnabi, a former theatre artist who has transitioned from captivating audiences on stage to compelling clients with her beauty and wellness expertise. She has transformed her passion for beauty, wellness, and makeup into two successful salons. Jahnabi soon however faced the hurdle of capital constraints, but financial support at the right time transformed her budding enterprise into a flourishing reality, culminating in an impressive annual turnover, close to 24 lakhs.

In this WomensWebXMahilaMoney impact series, we bring you entrepreneurs like Sharmila Hadawale who had not just the ambition to grow, but took the steps needed to bring their dreams to fruition. Apply for a loan of up to 25 lakhs to fuel your business growth by downloading the Mahila Money App on Google Playstore or visiting the website here.

Crafting beauty and dreams at the heart of Guwahati

Located on Zoo Road in Guwahati, Jahnabi Phukan’s Abloom Spa & Beauty Salon,  is more than just a beauty salon. It’s a canvas where she paints confidence and self-assurance for every client who walks through her doors.

Engaged in animated conversations, Jahnabi caters to her clients, her expertise flowing seamlessly from discussing makeup techniques to delving into the latest movies and musings. “My clients are like my extended family, a constant source of encouragement and trust. Thanks to their support, I now proudly own not just one but two thriving beauty salons in the city’s heart,” reveals Jahnabi with a glint of pride in her eyes.

The foundation of Jahnabi’s remarkable journey was laid during her formative years, sparked by a fascination with beauty and makeup, ignited by her elder sister’s nurturing guidance. “My baido (elder sister) not only introduced me to skincare and haircare routines but also experimented with makeup on me. Through these playful endeavours, I took my first steps into the world of beauty. Little did I fathom that this early exposure would shape my life,” muses Jahnabi, her voice infused with nostalgia and realisation.

It was a lot of hard work, but she persevered

Jahnabi’s journey to entrepreneurship took much work. She explored dance, theatre, and even cinema. However, life took her in unexpected directions, moving to different towns after getting married before returning to her hometown of Guwahati in 2018. It was here that her entrepreneurial journey began. “I started selling beauty products and worked under different makeup brands until 2021. Little did I know that this was the foundation of my beauty journey,” reflects Jahnabi, tracing the steps that led her toward her entrepreneurial leap.

Jahnabi set out on a path of continuous learning and growth, using determination as her guide. She immersed herself in the beauty business, selling products and mastering various healing massages. The pandemic tested her resilience, but it also became a preparation period. “I was preparing myself for my shop someday, probably a beauty salon,” she confides. “The pandemic was a period of introspection and readiness,” confesses Jahnabi.

As she embarked on her journey, a chorus of support and inspiration echoed around her. “It’s all because of my clients who believed in me and yearned for me to have my salon,” she chuckles. Their faith became a beacon, lighting the way to her dreams. As the world unlocked its doors in 2021, Jahnabi seized the moment, stepping into a parlour as an employee to get firsthand insights. With her savings, skills, and growing clientele, she inched closer to her dream.

Financial constraints that led Jahnabi to look for a partner support

She worked in the salon till 2021 and was at the same time looking to lease a suitable place and transform the same into a beauty haven. It was in Nov 2021 that Jahnabi finally made her dream come true and leased a place in Guwahati. “I used most of my savings to procure this place and customise the same to my customer’s needs. Although I was inching closer to my dream, I soon realised I needed more capital. The final push came from Mahila Money, a name suggested by a friend. The process was straightforward, and Jahnabi accessed a loan of 60K, utilising it to procure essential beauty products. “After attending Mahila Money’s loan sessions and understanding the process, I knew this was my instant solution,” affirms Jahnabi.

Watching the dream come true

January 2022 witnessed the realisation of Jahnabi’s dreams as her salon opened its doors. With her loan funds, she transformed her vision into reality, offering various beauty services that mirrored her passion. “My salon finally started, and it was the happiest day for me,” exclaims Jahnabi. She used the loan to purchase a hair spa machine and beauty products, and pay rent. She was now ready to welcome more clients and serve them better.

Paving the path for others

Jahnabi’s salon elevated her financial status and created employment opportunities for eight individuals. Her salon thrived and paved the way for a second establishment.” I just inaugurated my 2nd salon last month, and I am growing. My income has doubled, from earning 1.18 lacs, I am now making close to 2 Lacs,” she quotes happily. “The impact of the Mahila Money business loan has been immense. I have been paying all my EMIs on time and plan to apply for my 2nd loan soon,” reveals Jahnabi.

A glimpse into the future, unveiling grand visions

Jahnabi envisions a grand complex encompassing diverse beauty services, massage cabins, tattoo stations, dresses, and accessories to compliment their client’s looks. Her dream project stands as a testament to her ambition and serves as an inspiration for other women. When asked about advice for aspiring entrepreneurs, she says, “Trust your instinct, have confidence, and keep working hard.”.

Jahnabi Phukan’s story demonstrates the power of seizing opportunities and boundless possibilities that lie ahead when one harnesses their potential.

Image source: by Jacob Lund Free for Canva Pro

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3 REASONS WHY YOU MUST READ VIRGINIA WOOLF’S A ROOM OF ONE’S OWN IN THE SPIRIT OF WOMEN’S DAY

We celebrate Women’s Day every year with different themes that aim to highlight the progress, pursuit, and pain of women. The antiquity of our gender is extensively discussed and amplified in this month, often to underline how much of ‘her story’ remains left out from ‘history’. So, here’s a piece from ‘her story’ that I believe needs more spotlight, Virginia Woolf’s A Room of One’s Own.

First published in 1929, A Room of One’s Own, is a very long essay comprised of Virginia Woolf’s lectures from Women’s colleges at Cambridge University. In this relevant piece of literature, she analyzed meritoriously why there were no women writers at the time who wrote fiction, the reason why only men held the position of ‘geniuses’, and even touches upon queer relationships.

That synopsis alone should convince you to find and read this book. However, like Virginia Woolf, I too am a skeptic who believes in the power of over-analyzing. So, here are three reasons why you must read A Room of One’s Own this March.

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  • Women Need Money and A Room

The book starts with Woolf’s attempt at answering the question of why women writers were less likely to write fiction in that era. She rationalizes this with her own experience of writing fiction. She makes the point of how her inheritance of 500 pounds a year from her late aunt and having a room to herself gave her the freedom (mental and socio-economical) to write fiction, which otherwise wouldn’t be possible.

She affirms that for writing fiction or writing at all, one needs money for sustenance (which in other words means independence) and a room to think in. For women, it was a rarity to have a space all to themselves where they could be alone with just their thoughts, sans the responsibilities of their societal roles.

How could then a woman write at all? The road to freedom (to write fiction), according to Woolf, was paved with access- to 500 pounds a year and a room of her own.

  • Must One Be A Man to Be a Genius?

This was a rhetorical question posed by Woolf (a genius herself) in this book. She brilliantly unravels this myth using a thought experiment where she imagines what would have happened if Shakespeare had a fictitious sister. She asks her readers to imagine her as a genius with a brilliant mind, like Shakespeare. Could she then have become as great as her brother?

She argues that despite her brilliance, her life would have turned out very differently because instead of letting her pursue playwriting, she would have been forced to be affianced. Or in a different twist of the tale, she would have fled to a city and joined a theatre group with the hope of acting and writing where she would have inevitably faced discrimination and humiliation at the hands of men. Eventually, she would have fallen prey to one of the stage managers and died pregnant with his child.

Hence, she asserts that opportunities and privileges go together in making an individual a genius. Very few people can circumnavigate the trappings of a society and rise above to become great.

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  • A Great Mind is Androgynous

Strange as it may sound, Woolf makes a compelling case for this idea. She spoke about Shakespeare, Jane Austen, and more incredible minds who transcended the limitations imposed by their genders and created art that universally resonates to this day. And this she believed is where the greatness of a true genius lies.

She emphatically points out that a brain that’s only capable of thinking through a gendered lens cannot create. She underlines that an androgynous mind is porous and resonant. In other words, a free mind is free to create. Honestly, no arguments there.

 

I could go on and on about this piece of writing as this is truly the work of a transcendent genius who could see both sides and show the path of progress forward. So, if you could read just one book this March or year, make it this one and I promise you won’t regret it.

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For all Moms!

I am sure it is applicable to dads, too. But since I am a mother, that’s the space I can speak from. 😊 I am a new mom, and just about a year into the journey (nine months of carrying my baby girl Athyasaa in my womb, and she will be four months soon), I have had some profound experiences and as always, I have the need to express them – who knows, whom it will touch? So, here I am.

The first. “How is Athyasaa doing?” Some people message me and ask me this. But the messages I really appreciate are the ones that say: “How are you doing? How is baby?” Somewhere, once you become a mother – the world starts convincing you that all that matters is your baby. As if everything you are, is now defined by your child. I don’t agree, and I most definitely don’t comply. Me, as a person, a seeker, a dreamer, as all the other roles I play – continues, as always. Being a mother is divine. And yet, by no way am I confined to it. My humble requests to moms – as much as you cherish motherhood, cherish yourself as you were, are, and will be. You are a mother. And so much more. My humble request to the world. Please ask a woman how she is, before you ask her about her child. Let her know, both matter.

The second profound realization I have had is, you can only give that which you have. I see a lot of mothers – completely sleep deprived, angry, frustrated, exhausted insisting that they will do everything for their child (even when aid is available). I am no martyr. Fortunately, we have a nanny, and Arun is a hands-on dad. I happily share duties with both, along with being Athyasaa’s primary caregiver. I rest. I do yoga. I meditate. I do things that make me happy and take immense care of my child. If as a mom, you have options of sharing responsibilities with people you trust – please do. It helps you to sustain yourself and I have come to realize, a baby picks so much more of your thoughts and feelings and staying happy and healthy through it all, is going to go a long way in creating the same emotions for your baby. There is nothing you must prove to anyone, so please, do what you must for your own wellbeing too.

The third is, to understand Athyasaa is her own person and to not impose our likes and dislikes on her. By nature, I am a solitude lover. I love being with myself, thinking, wondering upon life. I feel complete by myself and enjoy my aloneness immensely. However, it was amply clear to us within a few weeks that our baby is a totally gregarious, people’s person. She coos, she expresses, interacts with everyone who visits her. Both Arun and I have large families and several close friends. My personal preference would be to limit the in-flow of guests at our home, and so would Arun. However, seeing how much our baby enjoys people we have opened our home (and hearts) in a way we never have before. Almost every day we have people coming in, being with her, playing with her. We realized, even at about 100 days our baby has a personality and we need to nurture it. We observe her and allow her to be her own little person rather than a mere shadow of us. In fact, when people look at her and keep guessing whether she looks like Arun or me, I whisper gently, “I think she looks like Athyasaa!” Some people get it, others don’t. But as a mom, I wish for my child to find who she is and not be confined to us.

I am enjoying this phase of my life intensely and immensely and wish all of us mothers make the most of this divine blessing – without losing ourselves in the process. What say?!

 

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What Stops Older Women From Playing Sports?

I was not a sporty kid and was never encouraged to play because no girl played sports in the 80s and 90s in India. After all, athletic skills didn’t add to the marriage market value. If busy parents had to choose to nag girls about doing something outside of studies, then they would much rather push them to learn stitching or cooking than to play a sport.

Anyway, it’s not their fault; I was the one who stayed and played sick during the games period or took up pending school work to avoid hustle in the field. I was that kid who wasn’t even selected for March Past on the sports day.

When I started playing a sport at forty, I started with zero. I started because I wanted to be an example to my kids, who couldn’t be the non-athletic version of me in childhood. They’ll be better than me in every way possible. I had no expectations of being the next club champion, but I was a healthy adult, and I thought I’d learn. Without the stamina, speed, or mental acuity of a sportsperson, it was a challenge not only physically but also socially.

What stops older women from playing?

I had noticed that only a few women played badminton in my club, and none above forty. I used to wonder why, but then I got the answer when I twisted my ankle while playing badminton at the age of forty-two. I encountered some well-wishers, including a doctor, who said you’re forty, you should quit playing sports. It came as a shock to me. Because why would anyone stop anyone from playing a sport?

As if household responsibilities, kids, and our physical limitations were not enough, people judge middle-aged women for taking time out to play a sport.

Isn’t it scary when a person who is supposed to be an expert in the field tells you that you’re wrecking your body by expecting more from it? Of course, nobody says that to a man. Men play sports well into their seventies.

I know that men and women are different physiologically, but what about mental capability? Shouldn’t sports cater to a person’s physical and psychological well-being? So why should we deprive women of that arena of wholesomeness?

With the outstanding achievements of women like Mithali Raj, Mary Kom, PV Sindhu, Sania Mirza, and innumerable more gritty ladies in the international sports arena, the viewership of sports events has been rising slowly but steadily. Furthermore, the advent of the Women’s Premier League (WPL) in 2023 has opened doors for girls all over India who want to take up sports as a career. WPL 2024 has witnessed an increase in audience at the stadium, but still it has a long way to go in comparison to the men’s premier league. 

New BBC research shows that less than 30% of Indian women play any sports, whereas almost three-quarters of Indians think sports are important in their lives today. What’s stopping them? Let’s dive into my analysis according to my experiences as a sportswoman. I do not have any trophies or medals to my credit, but only the zeal to improve. And it has worked wonders for my self-esteem. 

Badminton Vs life

I play a sport, and I’ve realised how similar every day at the field or court is to daily life. Some days are good days when everything goes your way. You’re making the perfect moves, placing precise drops and smashing the shuttle fiercely. But then there are some days when nothing goes your way. The shuttle is missing your racquet by inches, your drops don’t cross to the other side of the net, and your smashes repeatedly hit the net. Most of the days are your average days. You didn’t shine enough or screw up enough for those days to be memorable.

Then, some days are like inciting incidents that change the trajectory of your future in the sport. It’s a day like when you get an injury, and the doctor advises you to give up the sport. You are faced with a decision to give up what you love for your body or to keep on playing, that too for your body but also for your sanity. You can also enter the ladies’ doubles final in the year you played the tournament for the first time.

Successes, failures, fluidly flying bodies, and pains that weigh you down are all part of being a sportsperson.

The incredible women I play with

Women I’ve met while playing this sport have changed my perspective on life. Each one of them has some limitations: young kids, conservative in-laws, limiting bodies or whole lot of mom guilt. But they’re passionate about playing. We play to win, but if we lose, we keep playing. We’re past the age when losing used to hit hard. We crave victory, but at the same time, we are happy and grateful to be playing and not to be sidelined among the spectators. There is healthy competition, but outside the court, we are friends. The kind of friends I’ve been searching for my whole life. On the court, we are rivals without mercy. But outside court, they are my incredible support.

So when you see a woman over forty playing a sport, know it has not been easy. It’s not only about physical challenges; they’re here despite their demanding lives. Playing is mental therapy that not only releases endorphins and gives runners a high, but it also releases oxytocin and dopamine to make them feel loved. After all, an enthusiastic group of female cheerleaders can make anyone feel loved.

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Celebrating The Legendary Debonair Actor Shashi Kapoor On His 86th Birth Anniversary

The date March 18th is a very special day to remember since it marks the birth anniversary of the legendary debonair superstar Shashi Kapoor. 2024 marks the 86th anniversary of the unforgettable superstar! A man who was known to charm everyone with his infectious energy, versatile histrionics, gifted skills in acting, stage performances, directing, producing, and above all chivalry. As you can tell by his illustrious last name, he was the youngest son of Prithviraj Kapoor, the pioneer of the Indian Film Industry and the youngest brother to India’s Showman Raj Kapoor and India’s Elvis Presley Shammi Kapoor. Acting was something he began as a child in Raj Kapoor’s home production Aag (1948) and post that he never looked back. Whether it was performing on theatre or on the big screen, his voracious nature toward his work was vividly showcased in each and every character he portrayed. Indeed, he left behind intricately woven pieces of his full-fledged personality in all his characters and made them larger-than-life.

My fascination with him and his multiple works of art stemmed from my father who idolizes him and always felt an uncanny resemblance to him and his style of dressing and talking. Honestly, I always feel like I see my father in him since their personalities are strikingly similar.

There will never be anyone like him because his dedication and passion toward his craft is inexplicable. Like they say, an actor can never be forgotten since they leave behind a treasure trove of exemplary works of art. Legend Shashi Kapoor received numerous accolades and recognition globally for his cinematic masterstrokes. For instance, he was awarded four National Film Awards, two Filmfare Awards, Padma Bhushan, Dadasaheb Phalke Award, and the Oscars posthumously.

As an invaluable gem in the world of cinema, he has definitely set the bar high in films such as Waqt (1965), Jab Jab Phool Khile (1965), Aamne Samne (1967), Kanyadaan (1968), Haseena Maan Jaayegi (1968), Sharmeelee (1971), Aa Gale Lag Jaa (1973), Chor Machaye Shor (1974), Roti Kapda Aur Makaan (1974), Deewar (1975), Kabhi Kabhie (1976), Fakira (1978), Satyam Shivam Sundaram (1978),  Trishul (1978), Suhaag (1979), Kaala Paathar (1979), Junoon (1979), Shaan (1980), Kranti (1981), Silsila (1981), Namak Halaal (1982), Gehri Chot: Door Desh (1985), Pighalta Aasman (1985), and many more. Alongside his phenomenal performances in films, theatre held a special place in his heart. In many of his interviews, he has often mentioned Prithvi Theatre which he worked to renovate in the late 70s post his father’s passing and how he aspires to uphold the legacy. He has also talked extensively about his evolution as an actor and how he would often improvise the diction and tone of his dialogues. His everlasting devotion and love toward his wife Jennifer Kendal, a legendary English actress was a huge motivator behind his successes, failures, and career aspirations.

In this article, my goal is to delve into the nuances and aesthetics of his awe-inspiring and award-winning performances to provide the audience a glimpse into his inimitable caliber and outstanding talent. In conjunction, to take readers down to memory lane by revisiting his spellbinding dialogues that were relevant yesterday and are still relevant today! This article will focus on one of my favorite films Aa Gale Lag Jaa (1973) which translates to “Come, Embrace Me.” It is a classic romantic film directed by the exceptional director Manmohan Desai and stars Shashi Kapoor with one of his favorite co-star and lifelong friend Sharmila Tagore. In addition, veteran seasoned actors such as Shatrughan Sinha, Om Prakash, and Sulochana Latkar added more substance to the film. Most importantly, Master Titu added the much needed cherubic innocence to the film.

This film is one of my personal favorites because the plot is well-constructed with a whole range of depth and pathos. In addition, the organic on-screen chemistry between the lead pair is heartwarming and soul-stirring to watch. Indefinitely the result of multiple collaborations with each other and their off-screen friendship!

The film begins with the suave Shashi Kapoor (Prem) falling head over heels in love with Preeti (Sharmila Tagore) when he spots her arriving at a department store to purchase a Mac Crème Frost Lipstick while working. It is indeed love at first sight for him and he begins to chase her, coming face to face with her at an Ice Skating Fancy Dress Dance Competition where everyone is dressed up in various characters. Preeti looks breathtaking dressed as a Laila who is eagerly waiting for her Majnu. Hence, Prem arrives all dressed as Majnu but Preeti feels he looks more like a Pathan than a Majnu. The first trendsetting duet starts playing titled “Wada Karo Nahin Chodoge Tum Mera Saath” sung by legendary Kishore Kumar and Lata Mangeshkar.

After this rhythmical and mellifluous performance, the judges announce both Prem and Preeti to be the winners of the contest. Prem being the romantic Romeo he is (which is very similar to Shashi Kapoor’s personality in real life) starts flirting with Preeti by openly expressing his love for her. However, Preeti is still a bit weary and consults her friends to assess whether Prem is just fooling around or is indeed a decent young man. Within a few minutes, Preeti reveals that she is a medical student at Bombay Medical School, has come to Shimla for the holidays and politely requests Prem to come to the clinic the next day since they need a person to perform an experiment on. In a way, she is testing his self-proclaimed love for her and what he can do for her.

The experiment is titled “Freezing Cold Versus Human Body.” The experiment is testing what extreme freezing cold temperatures medically known as Hypothermia can do to the human body. If a person is exposed to extreme cold temperatures, then their blood levels will sink, and it may become difficult for them to survive if they fall unconscious.

The proposed primary method of treatment is to administer the patient with Coromine and Phentermine Injection. The second method is to administer Glucose saline if the previously mentioned medications are unavailable. However, without medications, brandy, or a hot water bottle can be utilized to provide body heat to the patient. If none of these medications are available, then the physiological transfer of body heat is the last resort to save the patient. In other words, the physical act of love if a man is trying to save a female patient. Taking the other person’s body close to you and transferring your body heat to the person who is shivering.

While he delivers this dialogue “Ishq cheez hee asi hai. Joh lagai na lage. Aur bujhai na bane” with his baritone voice and youthful enthusiasm, Preeti’s father Heerachand (Om Prakash) hears him from behind and confronts him about it, displaying his disproval for this budding relationship. This dialogue echoes the harbinger of first love.

There have been 2 renditions of the iconic song “Tera Mujhse Hai Pehle Ka Naata Koi Yuhi Nahi Dil Lubhaata Koi” which translates to “You Have a Previous Relationship With Me, It Is Not Casual For Someone To Rejoice My Heart” forms the foundation behind the film and the overall climax of the film. The first rendition is picturized on Shashi Kapoor (sung by Kishore Kumar). It is truly a melodious evergreen song that always tugs my heartstrings and unleashes positive vibes within the atmosphere. The second rendition picturized on Rahul (Master Titu) when Prem and Preeti finally come face to face at the party thrown by Dr. Amar’s younger sister Tikki successfully drives the emotional message home. This was sung by both Kishore Kumar (the voice of Shashi Kapoor) who later joins his son since he forgot some of the golden lyrics and Sushma Shrestha (the voice of young Rahul).

While finally succeeding in his plan which was to carry Preeti in his arms while singing “Tera Mujhse Hai Pehle Ka Naata Koi Yuhi Nahi Dil Lubhaata Koi” merrily. Disaster strikes and he accidentally drops Preeti in the freezing snow and into the even more freezing lake.

As Prem cannot bear to witness his beloved Preeti in such a painful state, he then remembers the experiment and the treatments for it if medications are not available. Without any other choice, he decides to transfer his body heat to her body and thus the physical act of love occurs.

This film was path-breaking in the sense that pre-marital sex was introduced which was not the usual norm back in the early 70s. Shashiji has enlightened the audience with a myriad of complex roles and educated the world about many controversial topics that were considered taboo at the time. In fact, he was the first actor who acted in Hollywood films such as The Householder (1963), Shakespeare Wallah (1963), Bombay Talkie (1970), Heat and Dust (1982), and many more. A true global artist and cinematic icon in his own right!

After transferring body heat, Preeti regains consciousness the next morning and realizes what happened. Prem expresses his discomfort in doing what he did since he was not expecting to do it but was left with no other alternative. Hearing this, Preeti reciprocates to his love and affection, thus falling in love with him since she owes her life and heart to him from now on.

She agrees to marry him after he proposes. Unfortunately, Preeti’s father objects to this union and insults Prem regarding his socioeconomic status. However, as passionate, and stubborn Prem is, he does not pay heed to her father’s refusal and leaves a note for Preeti stating that her father is against their marriage, and he must rush since his mother is sick. He writes that he will come back to meet her. Preeti’s father witnesses Prem handing over the note to the hotel receptionist requesting that only Preeti should receive this note. Demonstrating a streak of malicious intent, he changes the letter to something else that is the opposite of what Prem had originally written, deliberately creating misunderstandings between the two lovers, and subsequently separating them.

The altered letter written by Preeti’s father states that whatever Prem did with her was only due to money since she is the only daughter of a very wealthy father. The letter also requested to give him 5 lakhs on the day of the wedding and do not consider this as blackmail.

Reading this letter leaves Preeti shattered and heartbroken. She then decides to break up with Prem and leaves for Bombay with her father. Her father wants her to get married to Dr. Amar (Shatrugan Sinha) and gets them engaged once they return. Dr. Amar has been Preeti’s closest friend for many years and loves her. Once they get engaged, Amar flies to Germany for future medical studies and Preeti is left alone with the bittersweet memories of her first love, Prem. Subsequently, Preeti faints and realizes she is pregnant with Prem’s child. This further startles Preeti’s father who demands an abortion from Preeti but her maternal instinct kicks in causing her to remain adamant about giving birth to her child and bringing the child up as a single mother.

Preeti’s father comes up with the plan of shifting her to his friend Dr. Sudhin Majumdar’s nursing home in Khandala where she can deliver the baby, and nobody will find out that she was ever pregnant. The irony of fate is that Prem and his ailing mother are in the clinic. Since Preeti requires a female companion to take care of her during her pregnancy, Prem’s mother offers to take care of Preeti unaware that Preeti is indeed Prem’s beloved. As Preeti gets into labor pain, Prem finally sees her being carried on the stretcher and realizes that she is pregnant. While he rushes to take care of her, he is interrupted by the thorn in their love story who is none other than Preeti’s stern father.

After hearing that he plans on sending the newborn to one of his owned orphanages, Prem offers to accept the newborn and to raise him on his own as a single father. While promising Preeti’s father that he will stay away from Preeti and will never reveal to his son that Preeti is his mother. Tragically, Prem’s mother passes away due to cardiac arrest but breathes her last peacefully when Prem finally reveals that the newborn is indeed his and Preeti’s son, her grandson. The second half of the film captures the essence of an ideal father-son relationship adding more complexity to his performance. Prem names their son Rahul and tragically he is diagnosed with Polio leaving him handicapped.

Later in the story, we discover that Prem becomes a Skating Instructor and a search for new career opportunities brings him to Bombay where he runs his own Skating School. Skating is the hobby that brought Preeti and Prem together and is a salient theme in the overall narrative. Interestingly, both Shashi Kapoor and Sharmila Tagore learned how to skate prior to shooting for this film. As you can guess, the two separated star-crossed lovers encounter each other once again and begin to rekindle their lost romance. Their son Rahul (Master Titu) acts as the catalyst that ultimately reunites them, and the film is filled with many twists and turns. Without a doubt, a child does indeed melt the heart of even the most arrogant person and the same case happened when Preeti brings Rahul to her place, and he ends up playing marbles with Preeti’s father. Preeti’s father’s eyes begins to well up with tears as he begins realizing his mistake and how he was fully responsible for separating Rahul from his mother. In order to find out more about the end of the film and what happens to the characters, Aa Gale Lag Jaa is a mesmerizing film to watch!

Some of his memorable and immortal dialogues include “Mere Paas Maa Hai” from the blockbuster film Deewar (1975) directed by the legendary Yash Chopra highlighting the most significant possession a man can ever have in response to his brother (Amitabh Bachchan) claiming that he has wealth, property, and bank balances. The camaraderie and on-screen chemistry between the two brothers were heavily influenced by their genuine friendship, affection, and respect for each other in real life. Despite the dialogue being only a single line, it carries tremendous amount of gravitas. As a result, this dialogue has left a lasting impact on cinephiles for many decades. Below is a list of some of the most profound and evergreen dialogues from his other films.

“Woh afsana jise anjaam tak lana na ho mumkin, usse ek khoobsurat mor dekhar chorna accha hai” – Aa Gale Lag Jaa (1973)

 To translate: “The fantasy that is impossible to reach fruition, leaving that fantasy in a beautiful direction is best.”

“Khwaab zindagi se kai zyada khubsoorat hote hai” – Satyam Shivam Sundaram (1978)

To translate: “A dream is much more beautiful than life itself.” This gem was from one of his most treasured classics starring another favorite co-star Zeenat Aman. Their westernized outlook further cemented their working relationship and friendship.

“Yeh mat socho ke desh tumhe kya deta hai, yeh socho ke tum desh ko kya de sakte ho” – Roti, Kapda aur Makaan (1974)

To translate: “Don’t think what the country gives you, instead think what you can give to the country.” This captivating dialogue delivered by him sparks a flair of patriotism to arise and reminds citizens that we are bestowed upon the responsibility to make our nation proud with whatever we decide to pursue in life.

“Iss duniya me aadmi insaan ban jaye toh badi baat hai” – Kabhi Kabhie (1976)

To translate: “In this world, if a man becomes a human then that is a big deal.” Again, this powerful point of view spoken in his riveting voice is a gentle reminder to what humanity entails and how being a “good” human being in this world is ultimately the most desired outcome. This marvelous dialogue was uttered in response to Raakhee Gulzar’s question regarding the type of man he is. She was another favorite co-star of Shashi Kapoor. Both have delivered multiple successful films like Sharmeelee (1971), Trishna (1978), Basera (1981), Pighalta Aasman (1985), and many more.

“Hum gayab hone waalon mein se nahi hain… Jahan jahan se guzarte hain jalwe dikhate hain… Dost kya dushman bhi yaad rakhte hai” – Silsila (1981)

 To translate: “I’m not from those who disappear out of the blue… Wherever I pass by, I show my talent… Not just friends, even enemies remember me. This dialogue perfectly captures the essence of who Shashi Kapoor was, is, and will always be remembered as! In a sense, this dialogue serves as his identity as if this line was written specially to describe him.

“Yeh prem rog hai, shuru mein dukh deta hai, baad mein bahut dukh deta hai” – Namak Halaal (1982)

To translate: “This is the disease of love. In the beginning it gives pain, later it gives more pain.”

“Zyada paisa aaye toh neend nahi aati, neend aaye toh zyada paisa nahi aata” – Deewar (1975)

 To translate: “When you have a lot of money, then you can’t fall asleep. When you fall asleep, you don’t get a lot of money.” This line depicts the real-life of the middle-class population back in the 70s and is still relevant today.

“Aapna toh ek hee usool hai, jeeyo toh apne liye, sochon toh dusron ke liye” – Ek Aur Ek Gyrah (1980)

To translate: “I have one policy, live for yourself, think for others.” Quite a policy to live by, don’t you think?

“Maa, iss duniya mein apna paraye kuch nahi hota. Kuch log apnon ko paraye samajkar thukradeta hai. Aur kuch paraye ko apna lete hai” – Aa Gale Lag Jaa (1973)

To translate: “Mom, in this world there is no such thing as insider and outsider. Some people consider their own to be an outsider and reject them. And some accept the outsider and make it their own.” An immensely relevant dialogue that mirrors the values of humanity and the importance of creating affectionate bonds with all people.

“Mein zara romantic kissam ka aadmi hoon… shaadi ke baad ishq karna toh chhod diya hai…iss liye biwi se romance karke kaam chala leta hoon” – Kabhi Kabhie (1976)

 To translate: “I’m a romantic type of man… After marriage, I stopped falling in love… That’s why I romance my wife to make up for it”

“Libaas badal dene se aatma nahi badal jaati” – Jab Jab Phool Khile (1965)

To translate: “When you change your clothes, your soul does not change.” Immaculate words to live by as there is a wholesome amount of realism in this one line.

Finally, the legendary Shashi Kapoor brought life to each role he portrayed, was referred to as a perfect human being since he was a pure soul always friendly with colleagues, a humble gentleman, and a whole class apart. He is indeed one in a million and it is truly an absolute honor for me to write a tribute article celebrating his exuberant zest for life, lifelong passion for acting, magnetic screen presence, and the way he lived his life with full dignity and respect.

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How Reena Puri’s Childhood Passion For Comics Became Her Profession

Posted: March 17, 2024
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The executive editor of Amar Chitra Katha Comics, Reena I. Puri, has been writing and editing comics for the past three decades. While writing stories and love for animals came early in her life, her young sons urged her to write specifically for comics.

“At one point, I had to choose between two jobs – one at a business newspaper and the other at ‘Tinkle’ comics. My two young sons were big fans of Tinkle. They persuaded me to take up the Tinkle job. So, I decided to try my hand at writing for comics,” says Reena with a smile.

Reena worked under Anant Pai, the creator of the iconic ‘Amar Chitra Katha’ (ACK) and Tinkle comics from 1991 to 2005, and says he was more a friend and mentor than a boss. “I have been in the same job for three decades because I enjoy it so much. Where else would I be able to read and write comics for a job?”

Full of beans at 65, Reena talks about her favourite comics as a child. “I loved reading comics when I was a child. I would read ‘Beano’, ‘June and School Friends’, ‘Mandrake’, ‘Phantom’, ‘Batman’, ‘Superman’, ‘Archies’ and ‘Commando’. The first two were my favourites. How would I have known then that my childhood love for comics would translate into a full-fledged profession! A profession I love,” says Reena.

Rescuing animals is another passion of hers. Committed to caring for strays she, along with friends, set up an NGO in Mumbai called ‘Save our Strays’, which is big organisation now. Today, she lives in Bengaluru with four cats and a dog, all rescued strays.

Weaving stories as a child

Reena belongs to Kerala but grew up in Agra. “I would write four-line rhymes from a very young age. My parents encouraged my writing. I also had the knack of making up elaborate stories to get out of trouble,” she says with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

Reena started writing stories when she was about eight. She would sit on a tree or in the garden and write, setting her imagination free. She would look at the atlas to find places to set these stories. In school, she scored well when it came to creative writing.

Reena studied English literature at Indraprastha College in Delhi. She met her ex-husband during her college days. She completed MA from Delhi University and got married ten days later.

“My husband would encourage me to write. He had more faith in my writing abilities than I had myself. I wrote my first story for BBC Radio when I was 21. I could not believe it when it was accepted and broadcast. Writing for magazines such as ‘Illustrated Weekly’, ‘Caravan’, ‘Femina’ and ‘Imprint’ followed,” she narrates.

Her mother, the first feminist she knew

Reena’s mother left Kerala when she was 15 years old to study medicine in Agra. The British were encouraging women to become doctors and giving scholarships. She didn’t know Hindi, and only a smattering of English. She was an example of courage and grit for Reena. “Use your hands for a good purpose, whether you are a writer or a doctor,” she would tell her daughter.

“My three favourite ACK comic protagonists are women – Anandibai Joshi, the first lady doctor in India, Rukmabai, also a doctor and feminist who helped frame laws on divorce and rights of women, and Pandita Ramabai, a social reformer who worked for the cause of widows and girl child education.  We don’t know much about them. Thanks to ACK comics, children and adults have become aware of their work,” says Reena.

One of her favourites among the books by the ACK group is ‘Women in Power’. It was a Ministry of Culture project. It is about the 15 women members of the constituent assembly, all outstanding women, she says.

Comics can be a stepping stone to books

For children, who do not enjoy reading much, comics are a stepping stone to books, says Reena. ACK was launched in 1967, while Tinkle came out in 1980. Indian folk tales, classical literature, mythology, historical figures, stories of freedom fighters, modern-day legends, and other biographies, form the content of ACK comics. There are over 500 ACK titles today. Mr Pai’s goal was to acquaint children with their heritage and give them a sense of identity.

Tinkle comes across as pure fun but there is learning too. Also, Tinkle is a comic for, by and of children in a way. The group gets several letters a month from children even today who share their story ideas.

English is the primary language of publication. But the group publishes comics in Hindi and other regional languages, as well as a handful of foreign languages. In spite of digital options, the print versions of the comics are still very much in demand.

‘Animals are individuals’

“Living with animals is what has shaped me into what I am today. For me animals are individuals with distinct personalities. Through Tinkle stories too I have tried to convey the message to children that it is vital to respect animals and coexist with them. And, how important it is to be kind and compassionate to them. In fact, Tinkle has won the PETA award for being the most animal-friendly magazine,” says Reena.

Another conviction is to inculcate gender and race sensitivity in children. For instance, the unlike the early Amar Chitra Katha books, these comics do not depict gods as fair and demons as dark. Women are not shown cooking while men read newspapers. The group has a young, sensitive team who keep a watch on these aspects.

Reena is very fond of music, especially listening to instrumental music, whether classical Indian or western. She also keeps up with reading. “My grand-daughter Ira is just three months old. I gift her books, though she is so little. Let all the clothes and gold come from other people. I only want to fill her library, I tell my son,” says Reena.

As a senior citizen, Reena says she is lucky that she is still working. “I am fortunate that my company still respects the work I do. To work as long as one can is the most important thing. Not just for the financial independence, but also the confidence it brings,” asserts Reena.

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Dhvaani-aapki aur meri kahani #InvestInWomen

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The phrase “Women Supporting Women” is more than just a saying; I’ve lived it.

 

After handing over the Innovation-Technology Transfer Office to Reema Sahni Mediratta, I took a break, but soon felt restless. I was torn between entrepreneurship and finding a job while juggling my 2-year-old daughter. My entrepreneur friends’ stories inspired me to share their journeys, and I considered starting a podcast. Initially, I doubted my ability to engage and be comfortable on camera, but my family’s encouragement gave me the push I needed.

 

I dedicated myself to finding the perfect name, crafting logos, and designing the podcast’s visual identity with a supportive friend. I even composed the music myself! Stepping out of my comfort zone to engage with strangers was a challenge, but many were kind enough to oblige. I learned to prioritize working with respectful and professional individuals. Initially, I handled all editing myself, but later discovered a student startup who managed editing and subtitling, allowing me to focus on creating content.

 

I redefined Dhvaani’s scope by introducing new series and partnering with a women-founded organization to share startup ecosystem content, expanding my reach. Through Dhvaani, I showcase the stories of women entrepreneurs, ecosystem enablers, and experts, providing a roadmap for the next generation of women leaders to explore various career paths. Additionally, I created a series where experiences and learnings from the Department of Science and Technology’s WISE Scheme (formerly Women Scientist C Scheme) are shared. This scheme trains women in intellectual property rights, empowering aspiring professionals to explore diverse career options after completing this internship. By sharing these stories and insights, I aim to inspire and educate, creating a ripple effect of women uplifting women

 

Dhvaani is a shining example of women supporting women, where I am fortunate to have the backing of other women who share their stories, expertise, and experiences. Through Dhvaani, I provide a platform for these women to reach out to those who can benefit from their advice, tips, and journeys. Simultaneously, I am empowering women to find their voice and share their stories with those who are facing similar challenges and seeking solutions. In this way, Dhvaani creates a supportive cycle of women uplifting and inspiring each other, fostering growth and success.

 

Through Dhvaani, I have had the privilege of engaging in insightful interviews and knowledge sessions, which have left me feeling inspired and motivated. With each conversation, I have gained new perspectives, learned valuable lessons, and discovered the remarkable stories of women who are making a difference in their respective fields. At the same time, I have been humbled to find that my work with Dhvaani has also inspired others – a truly gratifying experience. I am deeply thankful to the incredible women who have supported me on this journey, sharing their experiences, expertise, and encouragement along the way. Their unwavering belief in me and in Dhvaani’s mission has been a constant source of motivation, and I am honored to be part of a community that lifts each other up.

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Mirror, Mirror on the Wall!

Posted: March 16, 2024
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MIRROR, MIRROR ON THE WALL!

 

“Girl, girl, girl…”

The voices echo!

Her lips are dry,

Her heart aches once again,

And the traumas of life resurface!

 

So what, if she gave her

Every drop of sweat,

Every pound of flesh,

Every unannounced tear

To those whom she called her own,

The words still keep reverberating,

“You are a girl!”

 

She has witnessed so many ordeals-

Ragged for not being a good cook,

Mocked at for not getting dowry,

Being inappropriately touched,

And yet, remaining silent was the only choice she had!

For, she was a girl!

 

However, unlike the previous times,

She composes back herself very fast,

Peeps at herself in the mirror,

And asks, “Don’t you think that I am beautiful?

I still know how to stand tall

Despite the challenges?”

 

The mirror, her only friend smiles back,

And replies, “Yes, you are!

I am not a mirror with magical charms

Though standing majestically on the wall-

But I am a mirror with a heart,

And every inch of me says

That you are beautiful

For no one has a heart like you!”

 

She smiles,

And sets off to conquer

Newer hemispheres!

She knows that she can

For she’s a girl

And accepting challenges was the only option

That she’s always known!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Angie Thomas’ Tale Of Unexpected Fatherhood Is Perfect Antidote To Andrew Tate’s Toxic Masculinity

Posted: March 15, 2024

Angie Thomas is probably the most powerful voice of her generation, and with Concrete Rose, the prequel to The Hate U Give (THUG), she has yet again set standards which even she will struggle to beat. This is the story of Maverick Carter– of what made him the man we came to love and admire in THUG.

One afternoon, he is a seventeen year old, slinging dope, playing basketball and buying gifts for his girlfriend. A few hours later, a DNA test comes out positive and he realises that he had impregnated his best friend’s girlfriend during a one night stand when his condom slipped. The mother of the child disappears and he is stuck with a three month old baby he had no idea was his. His mother insists that he ‘man up’ and shoulder his responsibilities. He learns to change diapers and burp the baby. He moves out his music collection to make place for the crib, and sells his recorder to buy essentials for the baby. He even gives up slinging dope and takes up a minimum wage job. His girlfriend breaks up with him, the baby keeps him awake at night, he is exhausted working in the grocery store and school becomes the one place where he can catch up on his sleep.

A teen single father from an underprivileged community

Normally a teen pregnancy turns the mother’s life upside down, but here it is the father who bears the brunt of it (though he had no say in whether or not the pregnancy should be continued). Though he had never been particularly ambitious, Maverick sees even the few dreams he had disappear. He sees no escape from a dreary future where he will be bagging groceries all his life. Angie Thomas does a remarkable job of getting into the psyche of the teenage father, and talking about how much damage the ‘men don’t cry’ myth does to young black men.

The book also talks about how few options are available to young black men growing up in black communities. Of how they are forced to align with the gangs in order to survive and of how they lack positive role models who might inspire them to do better. Maverick believes that “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”; since his father was an important member of a gang, he will have to join it too. It is only at the end of the book that he understands what his employer and mentor meant when he said that “while an apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, it can roll away if kicked at the appropriate time.”

Learning to take responsibility

One wonders how realistic Maverick’s mother’s character is. You admire how she teaches her son to be primary parent, but you also wonder how many women would have compelled their son to take on the responsibility instead of trying to return the child to the mother. Clearly she wants her son to be a better father than her husband had been, and this creates interesting dynamics between the two. There is another emotional part where she admits to her son that she is in a lesbian relationship with someone her son thought was her ‘friend’. He wonders why he feels betrayed by his mother, and also thinks of how his jailbird father is the only one to lose out completely.

Apart from his relationship with his mother, Maverick is in two other important and complex parent- child relationships- with his father who he starts to question, and with his baby son who he loves unconditionally. Each of the relationships is deeply nuanced, making the entire book a delight to read.

While there are many fabulous books written for young adults, there are not many that address the issues faced by young men. ‘Concrete Rose’ does a wonderful job of acknowledging the confusion faced by young men, especially those arising due to changing gender dynamics, and this book will certainly provide a counter to the toxicity spewed by Andrew Tate and other such proponents of the manosphere. While Maverick’s situation may not be universal, his confusion certainly is, which makes this a must read for young men.

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Image source: by Pixabay Free for Canva and book cover Amazon

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